Mental Health jokes
1273. Depression got the best of me. I'm gonna cry in my room now.
The only time you see a depressed person lifted up is when they hang themselves.
Suicidal people are a big contributor to the rope making industry.
If I went to Walmart, I would be able to scan my own wrists because they're barcodes too.
So I meet with a therapist on a weekly basis. We talk about my depression and how it's been getting worse. Recently, I've been advised about my condition, and how I've been discussing with her about being suicidal. She's been very helpful throughout it. I was even told I can pay in advance from now on, so I don't have to worry about it later.
If things don't get better, the Christmas lights won't be the only thing hanging.
If you take an emo kid grocery shopping.
You get to scan their wrists for discounts!
My parents telling me: "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."
Me upset about my suicide attempt doesn't succeed.
Hey, people don't fly with suicide jokes.
In fact, they hang with them!
Grew up playing Fruit Ninja on my iPad. Spent time with my online sister playing multiplayer.
Now I play it in school with an awesome small steel blade.
I’m not allowed my phone during school hours and I have to give it in at the start of the day...
Things I would’ve missed if my suicide attempt didn’t fail in 2020.
My attempt in 2021.
And my attempt this year.
People see this Rolex and they kill themselves.
Motherfucker, that's a suicide watch!
Doesn't having depersonalization mean that you're like the animatronics off of FNAF/Five Nights at Freddy's?
(If you don't know what depersonalization is, look it up.)
To whomever stole my anti-depression pills, I hope you're happy now.
Why did one emo say to the other?
"I like your cuts, G."
A leaf and an emo are both falling from a tree.
Which one hits the ground first?
The leaf, the emo got caught by a rope.
I called the suicide hotline in Iraq. The person got excited and asked if I can drive a truck.
A guy barges into a psychiatrist’s office and screams, “Doctor! I have suicidal tendencies! What do I do?!”
The doctor calmly answers, “Pay me in advance.”
Just all us depressed people joking about our depressed lives, we should hang out sometime.
It has been rumored that Disney is developing a movie based on suicide. The title?
Finding Emo.