Mental Health jokes

Flat earthers are completely wrong. If the earth was flat, I would have yeeted myself off the edge years ago!

What's the depressed person's favorite song?

Van Halen - Jump

How does the next train stop for a depressive person? Death.

Have you ever observed the depression cycle of a snail?

It's pretty much a downward spiral.

What's the difference between a depressed person and a pizza?

Pizza won't cut itself.

How long does it take for a depressed person to change a light bulb?

5 days. & I’m pretty proud of myself.

This is to the girl/boy named Gwen: Are you okay? I see there is a bunch of haters but DON'T, I repeat, DON'T let the haters get to you. I hope you see this and respond and that you are okay. Please Gwen, be honest.

What do Logan Paul, KSI, and the Japanese suicide victim have in common?

Tying.

Why can't depressed kids high five a tree? It will leave them hanging.

Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find home!

A serial killer was at my house and killed all my family but me. Why? I was in the living room.

What do sloths and depressed people have in common? They both hang off trees.

What is a group of depressed kids called? The suicide squad.

What do you call a depressed tree?

A wood cutter.

what's a depressed person's favorite game?

hangman

What part do people slit the most?

Everyone.

What's the difference between depression and your ex?

Depression fucks you harder.

What do you call a group of depressed kids?

The suicide squad.

Mickey Mouse went to a psychologist and told him, “I’m having problems with my girlfriend.”

The psychologist said, “You mentioned that you think she is crazy.”

He said, “I didn’t say she was crazy, I said she’s fucking Goofy!”

Friend 1: What's your favorite drink or food?

Friend 2: Pizza.

Friend 3: Donuts.

Friend 4: I don't eat food but I do drink bleach.

Friend 1: (calling the suicide hotline)

Friend 2: (Calling the parents)

Knock knock. Who's there? Crippling depression. Crippling depression who? Me.

Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Seven’s been worried about six even since he left Afghanistan. Every time 6 closes his eyes, he sees the war and hears the gunshots. He sees the blood, the killing, the death, and soldiers falling. When he looks at seven, he remembers when they were forced to eat their own flesh to not starve in those caves. He sees the war and the flashbacks will come back forever, burned into his soul and mind.

What do you call a group of depressed kids?

The suicide squad.

Can some hot depressed suicidal guy give me his number so we can cry about being depressed and wanting to die?