I didn't mean to call an Afghanistan hotline. I told them I was depressed, then they asked if I know how to drive a truck. I don't know how that has anything to do with it!
Depression :)
Do depressed people hate swimming?
They hate it because they are already drowning in their depression, but they love it because it might make all their dreams come true.
Somebody: Do you even eat and get sleep?
Me: I have depression, what do you think?!
What is my most popular side of myself?
Suicide.
One day a man buys a rope to commit suicide, but his friend stops him.
They go to a school with lots of happy kids. The guy feels better after a mag.
I think I'm a red zebra!! Cuz I'm stripped red, iykwim.
People always often say to someone who are thinking about suicide that's the easy way out. Don't give up! All I say is I'm not giving up, just I'm giving in, and does it really seem like it's the easiest way out? I don't think so, it's probably the hardest if you ask me, or I would have done it already, but someone's got to do it.
Sam is a kindergartener. One day, Sam’s teacher told him to learn the first few letters of the alphabet. Later that night, Sam asked his moody sister what the first letter of the alphabet was, and she replied with “Oh, what’s the point. Life is meaningless...”.
Sam then went up to his room and found his brother crying on the floor. Sam asked him what the next letter was. “I hate you!” said Sam’s brother, so Sam left the room. Sam went to his mom and asked her what the third letter was. “You stupid f*****,” his mom yelled at him. So Sam went to ask his Grandpa what the fourth letter is, and his grandpa didn’t reply, so Sam went to bed.
The next day, Sam’s teacher called on him to tell the class what the first letter is, and he answered with “Oh, what’s the point. Life is meaningless...” and the teacher sent him to the school counselor. As he left the room, he yelled at his teacher “I hate you!”
As Sam arrived at the counselor’s office, she said she had called his parents and they wanted him to be safe and locked up in a padded cell. “You stupid f*****,” Sam screamed as he heard the ambulance sirens getting nearer. As the ambulance drove away, Sam, in his straight jacket, was silent.
Maybe if the grass on my front lawn had depression, It would cut itself.
On the plus side, I finally hear voices talking to me... just wish they were outside my head.
I sexually identify as kilometers per second.
Cuz I really wanna km/s (kill myself).
What's the difference between my ripped jeans and my arms?.
None.
You guys, this is my last time publishing something here. You guys have been sending rude comments, and I need to work on my mental health. Goodbye.
Ever had that feeling that suicidal people are a big contributor to the razor blade industry? Well they aren't. Why? They aren't repeated customers.
Wanna come hang out with me?
I constantly wonder how people can live happily ever after, but then I realized that antidepressants don't make you OD.
Why can’t you trust an emo kid?
'Cause they always leave you hanging.
What's a crazy man's favorite phrase when he has a knife?
"Freak out!"
What is better to have autism or down syndrome or ADHD?
