Medicine jokes
Why do hospitals have air conditioning?
To keep the vegetables cold and fresh.
I cannot believe no one's come up with a cure for anorexia yet. I thought it would be a piece of cake!
Q) What is the ONLY zodiac sign ever to be surgically removed?
A) Cancer.
What do you call an epileptic kid?
Little Seizures.
What do a gynecologist and deaf people have in common? They both read lips.
Why did Grampa pass out? Because of diabetes.
Hey girl, are you osteoporosis, because you're giving me a "bone" condition.
Q: Why do I like bone jokes so much?
A: Because they are humerus.
If Stephen Hawking gets a heart attack, where do you go, the hospital or Curry's PC World?
Q: Why did the fly go to the hospital?
A: For the doctor to make it get "butter!"
Time heals all wounds.
Unless you have AIDS, when time kills you slowly and painfully.
What did the hematologist say when his Canadian patient wrote that he's blood type "eh"? "Ah, probably just go with blood typo!"
A woman delivers a baby. The doctor takes the baby and throws it, smashing it around the hospital room, drop-kicking it, etc. The mother starts freaking out, being held back by nurses, begging “WHYYYY!!??”. The doctor holds the baby upside down by the ankle and says “I’m just fucking with you, it was born dead”.
When you have to get your prostate checked and you can feel the cold rubber of the glove, but you realize both the doctor's hands are on your shoulders.
In life, some people have it harder than others.
That's why Viagra exists.
If laughter is contagious, LEO is immune.
Why are there no chemists in Africa?
Because you can’t take tablets on an empty stomach.
What do you get when you mix Viagra with spinach?
Strong to the finish.
The only doctor you have is Doctor Pepper.
What do dentists call their x-rays?
Tooth pics.