Means jokes

Don't say your life is a joke because jokes have meaning.

Iron Man: Where are you from?

Thor: Asgard.

Iron Man: Do you mean ass guard?

Friend 1: I don't want to jump.

Friend 2: Me neither.

Murderer: If you don't jump, I'll stab you.

Friend 1: *jumps*

Friend 2: *jumps*

Murderer: I didn't mean off the building!

Friend 1: I know that. I just pretended to jump to get rid of that guy.

Orphan boy: "Your dad is probably disappointed in you. I mean, look at you."

Me: "Well, at least my parents kept me. Where are yours?"

I'm hertophobic.

It means I'm allergic to straights.

What do you call a dumb and mean crocodile?

A crookodile.

A lady runs into a police station and yells, "Help, help! I've been graped!"

A police officer says, "Do you mean raped?"

The girl then replies, "No, there was a bunch of 'em!"

2019 Senior Prank: Hey fellas, let's black out the school. Haha, we're so sneaky, oh yes!

2020 Senior Prank: Hey guys, I'm a tech whiz, let's spread a rumor on the internet saying a disease called the corona virus exists! Haha, it'd be so funny and good, even the whole world might fall for it!

Everyone in December 2020 looks at tech whiz: "...you son of a b*tch!!!"

Tech whiz: "You guys are the a**holes! I mean you fell for it for a whole year!"

Mother: Who do you like more, me or your dad?

Liam: I like you both.

Mother: Ok, if I go to america and your dad goes to paris, where will you go?

Liam: I will go to paris.

Mother: That's means you like dad more.

Liam: No, its because i like paris.

Mother: Ok, fine, if I go to paris and your dad goes to america, where will you go?

Liam: I will go to America.

Mother: Why?

Liam: Because I have already gone to paris.

If people who live in Canada are Canadians, I mean if they drink Fanta, they’re fantastic.

Daughter: Dad, why are you so mean?

Dad: Because you are so mean, that's why.

Daughter: You so get on my nerves.

Dad: I am gonna slap you in your god darn head if you don't shut up.

Daughter: Wow, Dad, you savage.

Dad: 21 SAVAGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Daughter: Oh my God, I am tellin' Mom that you are doin' that thing again.

I don't know why Trump has orange skin but has white around his eyes. So does that mean he is some fucking dog?

My cat is red and brown and her bones are crunchy, so does that mean she is a Kit Kat?

If you get a divorce with your husband, does that still mean you’re siblings?

What is Green and Red and goes round and round?

A frog in a blender.

(this next one is pretty bad, and I don't mean it, so don't get offended)

What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench?

One can support an average family.

Have you seen all the pants with crazy designs on them? I mean, britches be crazy!

I find it best to screw people with memory loss. I mean, what's my grandma gonna do? Describe me to the cops?

We all hear cause we cut ourselves, right? I mean, JK.

It's funny that everyone is depressed, like, I mean:

Bullys are depressed.

Nerds are depressed.

Bad girls/boys are depressed.

Kind humans are depressed.

Why are so many people mean to orphans?

They can’t cry to their parents.