ME jokes

Karens yell, I scream, my mum fucks me.

My sister: See you at home in about an hour.

Me: Okay.

My sister: Sister, where are you? *She looks out the window.*

Me: Sis, I'm here, can't you see me?

Sister: OMG, she's dead!

Me: Yeah, I know, but can't you see me?

"Go get me the lamb sauce!"

Prince, are you really gay, because I love you with all my heart and pray for you all the time!

PLEASE CHOOSE ME INSTEAD! :(

Gwen, are you mad at me? Cause that was a faker.

Like the faker Gwen?

Where is this pic of me in my bra?

Friend: Your life is a joke.

Me: No, jokes have meaning.

There's at least 856 pages of these newest puns. I couldn't finish, because it took me an hour just to get that far. Just saying, that's a lot of jokes!

You know how girls say, "I would have sex with you if you were the last person on earth"? Well, who's gonna stop me?

"Prince, please help me. This faker is driving me crazy!"

Hey, why did you copy me, you dumb-ass prince?

"Prince, do you love the faker, Princess, or me, the real Gwen?"

My sister said download "Among Us" on my iPad, so I did. Then she taught me to play. Then she told me a code and told me where to put it, and I typed in the code.

Then she was the imposter, and I was a crewmate, so I was sticking with her, and she killed me when we made it to the medbay.

Bitch: Nice eyebrows.

Me: Yeah, where's yours, motherfucker?

Bitch: (Realizing she shaved them off cause she thought it would look cool)

Man: Could you hold this for me?

Kid: Ok mister! I love playing with a pew pew! Pow! Pew! Pew! Bang! *GUNSHOT*

Man: Dammit, now who am I gonna put in the van?!

"You gave me the same sweater as last year."

"You s w e a t e r believe it."

They call me Elsa cause I’m too icy! 🥶❄️

I'm a teacher at a high school, but I got fired. They told me I didn't do any work even though I always did a skele-ton.

I saw a man today wearing a t-shirt that said "I'm with stupid."

I told him, "You know, that's not very nice."

He looked at me and said, "I'm with stupid, too."

I had bullies behind me on the street, but they were too fat and slow, so they got ran over by a truck that represents fat and slow.