ME jokes
Me and rose bushes have something in common: mangled, can hurt, red, and people only like one part.
What's the difference between me and the rest of America?
I love one and hate the other.
What's the difference between me and an orphan's parents?
I actually come back with the milk.
There was a kid sitting in a corner.
Me: "Hey! Why are you here at an orphanage?"
Orphan: "..."
Me: "Oh, wait, you're an orphan."
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
QoS.
QoS who?
QoS there me me who me and you.
Memes
My parents created a joke 11 years ago and people are still laughing at it, but I know it's not me because jokes have meaning.
What's the difference between me and a corpse? I mean, I'm not dead... yet, right?
"I miss you.
Being happy was never that hard without you..."
Someone's dad: You think he/she wants to join me? I didn't get the milk...
What do youuuuuuuuuuu Oh f***, my mom is gonna kill me! My shit is stuck on the toilet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Two people stood in one room. The first guy stared at the second.
First guy: “Sorry I had to punch you. It was a game, bro.”
Second guy: “Between me and you talking, there’s almost no PUNCH line. Hah!”
We were watching a 9/11 documentary in class.
I started playing the Angry Birds theme song. That didn't fly well with people, the teacher yelled at me like a bomb, and I landed on the ground.
I went to a store to get milk, but when I got home, there were a million cows waiting for milk, so they killed me.
What were the balloon's last words to his Father?
"Watch me, Pop!"
Mum: Why are you throwing a paper plane at the twins?
Me: 😈
I gave my sister a compliment and said she's pretty, then while she was saying thanks, I said, "pretty ugly."
Me: You are pretty. Her: Thanks. Me: Pretty ugly.
The man says, "Can you hump me?" So the other boy says, "Bro bro bro bro bro."
Tell rumors about me, but please don't say I'm in a love relationship.
Somebody asks me: How many YT subs you got?
Me: More than you!
I'm so poor that they let me buy the entire store! For $0...
My mom told me to help her with the laser, but it was opposite day, so I pushed her down.
She said help, so I kicked her.