I caught the flowers at a wedding-now married to a hot guy. But then i caught andit at a funeral i kinda nervo...............
š“ š ā°ļø āļø If a gay male is married to a well-endowed physically challenged gay male that has been sleeping in bed for three hours nonstop, and he wants him to wake up do he can fix him his morning breakfast, how does he wake him up? Wake up sleeping Jesus by giving him a blowjob
there's a plane crash every single person died who lived? the married people!
Why can't melons get married?
Because they cantaloupe.
Angelina Jolie was married to Brad Pitt...
Does that make her a "Brad Nailer", and him a "Jolie Jumper"?
Hey, my man, why you got them damn old, stanky-looking Whoopi Goldberg cornrows on you head? Are y'all twins, or boyfriend and girlfriend, 'cause if y'all are, go get married in Color Purple land.
Q: Why are orphans so scared to get married?
A: They don't know what it feels like to have a family.
You see a boat filled with people, yet there isnāt a single person on board. How is that possible?
All of them are married!
Are you a marry, because you are my mother?
Global warming will kill every single person on this planet.
It's a good thing I'm married.
I just gotta come out and say it: I like miners, and I donāt care what yāall think. I mean the fact that they are risking their lives just to make ours a little easier is amazing. Iāve always wanted to marry one, to be honest. Yāall need to give more respect to the mining ā community.
You want to get her pregnant before marriage to know if she's fertile, so why not marry a single mother that already has proof?
Friend: Hey, let me give you a little riddle. There's a table [for] four people who are supposed to sit [at]. There is you, me, Will, Mary. In which order will they sit?
Other friend: Uhm, you, me, Mary, and Will?
Friend 1: Nope, guess again!
Other friend: Okay, what about "Will you marry me?" Oh, wait...
Friend 1: Of course!!!! :D
Mayonnaise marry me?
Why do Indians marry cows? Because they bathe in milk.
When I was walking home, a couple of married guys were saying, "Your mom is good at her job," but I realized my mom doesn't work.
So I ask my mom, "Why are these guys saying you're good at your job? You don't work." My mom said, "Yeah, I got a new job." So I said, "What do you do?" My mom said, "Job hand, no, I mean it's called a hand job."
Who did yo mama marry?
Joe Mama.
Yo momma's so fat that she got married to diabetes!
There once was a boy named Sammy who loved this girl beyond belief. Her name was Rayne, but she didnāt notice him and or talk to him, but one day she did, and the ended up liking each other and getting married and living happil- wait no, thatās not right. Sammy actually snuck in Rayne's house one day and kidnapped her and locked her in his basement and made her into a puppet so he could keep her forever and ever. The End.
What's the difference between my wife and her sisters?
Her sisters ate hotter, and I married the grenade.
