Man jokes
People were deciding how to punish a terrible criminal, and one man came up with a great idea.
He sat him in a movie theater with no food at all and made him watch a 12 hour documentary about the country Hungary.
A man is talking to his doctor after undergoing a whole range of tests to try and find out what’s wrong with him.
The doctor sits him down and says, “I’m so sorry to have to tell you this, but the results are back, and I’m afraid it’s fatal.”
“Oh no!” exclaims the man, “How long do I have?”
“Ten,” says the doctor.
“What, years? Months?!”
“Nine...”
What's the difference between Ironman and Ironwoman? One is a superhero and the other is a simple command.
Man's hairline is back-court violation!
There once was a man that wanted to join a group of right-handed men, but he wrote with the other hand. He got left behind.
I will never understand why manslaughter is illegal.
Men should be able to laugh at whatever they want.
What did the people in 9/11 say when they got the wrong pizza? Man, they got it wrong, I wanted this shitty plane!
Why did the transgender man only eat salad?
Because he was a "her" before.
F*** man, I just need a f***ing loli to walk all over me!
I asked the orphan if he wanted to watch all the Tom Holland Spider-Man movies with me, and he started crying.
Why do more women than men oppose abortion? Because they prefer not to get raped.
Why do more men than women support abortion? So they can keep raping women and the victims will just abort their kids to not have to relive the experience!
How does a disabled man go to church? He can't, there's no ramp.
Why did the blind man get killed? Because he never saw it coming.
If you buy two condoms, but you're banging a woman, it's fine, don't throw it away, just make her transgender.
I dunno man, worked for me.
Who was the meanest man in the world?
He raped Helen Keller and threw her down a well, but not before cutting off her fingers so she couldn't yell for help.
A wise man once told me: "If you poke the bear in prison, the bear will happily return the favor when it's time to shower."
I am Buzz Aldrin, the second man to walk on the moon.
Neil before me.
Me: Do you ever just walk into a room and forget what you were doing?
Bank teller: [eyes wide] Uhhhhh...
Me: *scratches head with gun* Man, I hate it when this happens.
What do you get when you cross a Jamaican with a ginger?
A gingerbread man.