Mama jokes
A black boy walks into the kitchen where his mother is baking and accidentally pulls the flour over onto his head. He turns to his mother and says, “Look Mama, I’m a white boy!” His mother smacks him and says, “Go tell your Daddy what you just said!” The boy finds his father and says, “Look Daddy, I’m a white boy!” His Daddy bends him over, spanks him, stands the boy back up, and says, “Now, what do you have to say for yourself?” The boy replies, “I’ve only been a white boy for five minutes and I already hate you black people!”
I went to an orphanage and had a yo mama smack down. That's it.
Yo mama's so stupid, she took a Covid test and got an F.
I like your mama's big butt, and I cannot lie.
Yo mama!
Your mama is so fat, One Punch Man had to punch twice.
Yo' mama's cooking is so bad, your family prays after they eat.
Yo mama so dumb, she stuck a battery up her butt and said, "I have the power."
Yo mama so fat when she went on a plane, somebody yelled "A solar eclipse!"
- Yo mama is so fat, when she wears a yellow dress, people yell "Taxi!"
- Yo mama is so stupid, she tried to climb Mountain Dew.
- Yo mama is so ugly, she made a blind kid cry.
- Yo mama is so old, she knew Burger King when he was still a prince.
- Yo mama is so poor, she can't even afford to pay attention.
Yo mama so fat, you must refuel twice to run over her with a car.
Yo mama's so dumb, when a robber stole her TV, she said, "You forgot the remote!"
Yo mama so fat that when I banged her in the jacuzzi, there was a level 8 tsunami.
Little Johnny walks in on his mom taking a shower and slips and falls under her, and he says, "What's that, Mama?" She says, "That's just an old bear." He says, "He's a mean bear." She says, "Why's that?" He says, "He's got blood in on eye and shit in the other."
Yo mama so old, her birth certificate expired.
Yo' mama so stupid, she returned a donut because it had a hole in it.
Yo mama so fat that she needs two watches for two different time zones.
Puerto Rican teen: I'm a waste, a failure, NUNCA LO PODRA ASER (I'll never be able to do it).
The mother: AI NINO (OH CHILD).
The teen: QUE? (WHAT?)
The mother: NO TE PONGA CON ESTA MIELDA OTRAVES! (DON'T START WITH THIS SHIT AGAIN!)
The teen: I CAN'T DO SHIT RIGHT MAMA!
The mother: OOOHHH YEAH WELL TU SI PUEDES ABLAR MIELDA DE TI, I BOTAR BASURA! (YOU SURE CAN TALK CRAP ABOUT YOURSELF AND THROW OUT THE TRASH.)
The teen: QUAL (WHICH).
The mother: MADRE DE DIOS (MOTHER OF GOD).
The teen: AVIA UNA NEGRA I OTRA BLANKA (THERE WAS A BLACK ONE AND WHITE ONE).
*A phone buzzes.*
The teen: Whose phone is that, ma?
Unknown: MR. PRESIDENT IF YOU TAKE AWAY THE CONFEDERATE FLAG HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHO THE BAD WHITE PEOPLE ARE?
*Runs to bag, opens white one and sticks hand in.*
The teen: HAIR GEL
Yo mama so stupid, she tried to stop the Cold War with a heater.
Yo mama so stupid, I told her Christmas was right around the corner--and she looked.