Love jokes
John F. Kennedy: "Are you a bullet? Because I can't get you out of my head."
What does an orphan wish they could do?
Wish happy Mother's Day and Father's Day.
Guys, say "I love gape horn" really loud and you will get good luck for 10 years.
A Chinese boy never met his parents after they were killed in WW2, so when he learned where they were buried, he quickly rushed there.
He sat down in front of their graves and prayed, "I want to see your face again, mommy..." A miracle happened; his mother rose up from the graves and hugged him.
The boy cried then said, "I want to see you too, dad." He looked at his father's grave, but nothing happened.
Suddenly, a Japanese soldier came up behind him and asked, "Were you looking for me?"
Hi 👋 I love 💕 you know I do. What a good night of a good [something].
What is hard about having a relationship with an astronaut?
They are always so distant! :-]
I told kids to make a family tree. God, I love working at the orphanages.
My cousin really loves baseball.
He always brags about how many home runs he hit in the minors.
Y'know what's really sad?
Why break the fourth wall when you can turn the third wheel?
A teacher asks her class, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” Little Johnny says “I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best b*tch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day.”
The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with the bad behavior of the child, decides not to give importance to what he said and then continues the lesson. “And you, Susie?” the teacher asks. Susie says “I wanna be Johnny’s b*tch.”
Why are women in love with plastic because they had a plastic "galflalflflfalfl?"
How to make an orphan BLEED?
Step 1 - Tell them to clap until they actually have a loving family.
Step 2 - LAUGH EVILLY as they BLEED.
Step 3 - Tell them to kys.
Step 4 - Leave that mental asylum.
For people who love Gwen and think she is the best person on this website, comment if so.
I love jumping off cliffs.
I love you, Lovely Perv!
Who likes Fortnite? Gwen Stacy is in the game, let's goooooo! I love her!
Why doesn't the orphan date the girl?
Because she is a home-y.
If I were a cat, I'd spend all nine of my lives with you.
Santa's sack is big because he only comes once a year, but his sack is SO BIG after containing the lovely eggnog he has that those weigh the sleigh.
He never had kids because he comes in the chimney.
Husband: Hey honey, words can’t describe how beautiful you are.
Wife: Aww, thanks.
Husband: But numbers can. 0 out of 10.