Me:how does this thing work? ForTnite kid: oh u don’t know how to use a pistol look I’ll show you ForTnitekid: shoots foot Me: that wasn’t a very good demonstration
"Hey, hey Spongebob! Water you doing?" [laughs]
"Just looking all my coins with my metal detector because beach better have my money!" [laughs]
"How much have you found so far?"
"Y'know what, I'm not really shore!" [laughs]
When you think you're depressed but you know you're probably just using depression to be lazy and self loating but then you realise that it in itself might actually be a symptom of depression
Well gang it looks like we've got another mystery on our hands
My Dad was mowing the grass today, I looked out the window and saw him slumped over the lawnmower. Apparently, he was just going through a rough patch.
I can always tell if someone is lying just by looking at them, I can also tell if they are standing.
Are you made of Gallium and Yttrium? Because you are looking a little bit Ga Y
How did the digital clock show off to its mother? Look, Ma, no hands!
Thank you so much for helping me get to 20 followers! I'm so happy, even time I look at my followers going up, it makes me so happy. I can't wait to keep posting other things on here! <3
Who said white people cant jump? Look at the footage from 9/11
bro you cant talk you look the dwarf from snow white and the seven dwarfs
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
You look so pretty. Not at all gross today.
Ok so I have a joke for you,go look in the mirror and when you realise come back to me and tell me.
If a furry looks like an animal, sounds like animal, and acts like an animal, can I run over it with my car like an animal?
A man goes into a job interview and sits down. The interviewer is looking over his resume and says, "I see here that there's a 4-year gap on your resume. What were you doing?" The man says, "Oh, that was when I went to Yale!" The interviewer is impressed and says, "That's great! You're hired!" The man smiles. "Really? I'm so glad, because I really need this Yob."
Wanna hear a joke about Donald Trump? Ok, Melania totally married him for his good looks, believe me!
So I was in the bathroom at school washing and this girl walked out of the stall and she was like "hey can you make me laugh? I have been having a pretty bad day." And I was like sure and I was like come here and so she came over to me I was like girl look at ur self in the mirror and she started laughing so hard and she said I'm so ugly.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
This pastor decided to skip church one sunday morning and go play golf.
He told his assistant that he wasn't feeling well. He drove to a golf course in another city, so nobody would know him.
He teed off on the first hole. A huge gust of wind caught his ball, carried is an extra hundred yards and dropped it right in the hole, for a 450 yard hole in one.
An angel looked at God and said "What'd you do that for?" God smiled and said "Who's he going to tell?"
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
