Location jokes
Where does a French cat live?
- In Purr-is
OR
- In the Catacombs
OR
- In a chat-eau.
A boy asks a zookeeper, "Why is there a baguette in a cage?"
The zookeeper says, "It's bread in captivity!"
A man walked into a bar...
Ouch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Why do musicians in New Orleans smell so good?
Because they're jasmine (jazz men)!
Are you a playground? Because I want to put my kids in you.
Recently, I've found out my wife has been cheating on me for the past 3 weeks with a baker downtown in Manhattan, New York, thinking I wouldn't find out. Irony of it all, she received a yeast infection.
Where did Johnny go after he wandered into a minefield?
Everywhere.
Little Johnny was late to class. The teacher asked him where he was. Little Johnny said, "I was on top of Marry Hill." Then a kid comes late to class and also said he was on Marry Hill. Then a little girl that's about 4 or 5 comes in. The teacher asks, "Who are you?" She said, "I'M MARRY HILL!"
Why go across town when you can go across the hall?
Two people are sitting in a skyscraper.
P1: Hey, what wifi are you connected to? The company wifi is horrible.
P2: Airplane wifi.
What did the house painter ask when he went to the abortion clinic?
"Where do you keep the cans of paint?"
Charli tries to roast me: Roses are red, violets are blue, and you look like poo.
Me: You must have been born on the highway because that's where most accidents happen.
Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the bay, they would be called bagels.
Papyrus: Well come to the underground.
Sans: How was your falls?
Papyrus: G-g-good luck eve-ever ge-getting o-out.
Sans: Give me your balls!
What did the mother say to Michael J. on the beach?
"Excuse me sir, but you're in my son!"
What mental disorder do all Mexicans have?
Borderline Personality Disorder.
The other day I pushed a Chinese woman off the Golden Gate Bridge. I was Wong on so many levels.
A man is walking into the woods with a young boy.
Boy: “Hey mister, it’s getting dark out and I’m scared.”
Man: “How do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone.”
Where can a gay male that is abled bodied find the location of a glory hole if he is looking for a free and anonymous blowjob from another gay male?
From a physically disabled gay male who is either at the gym 💪 💪 🏋️♂️ or at the rest area ♿️ 🚹 🚽.
When people tell me to "go to hell," I tell them their address.