Living Jokes

Your mama is so stupid, she bought tickets for Xbox live

What do you call an emo kids suicide live stream? America’s funniest home videos

If you are American in the living room, what are you in the bathroom?

Euro-peein

Why does sally have a 100 sisters? She lives in a orphanage

Remember kids, when you're angry, burn down an orphanage. Then they'll really be living the hard knock life.

It's funny how teachers are supposed to educate new lives but only teach certain kids how much they want to commit suicide and how many ways there are.

I like my women how I like my wine

Aged 9 years and lives in the basement

Blue: The ocean is place where the creatures live Black: NIGHTMARES LIVE Blue:it has many pretty things and it will- Black: KILL YA TO DEATH! Especially if you are on titanic! so let that sink in. PUN INTENDED!

911 what’s your emergency Me, my grandma just passed out in the living room and I think she’s dead Well it’s not a living room any more Me, hangs up

Kenny is living with his girlfriend now. He just moved back in with his mom.

What do you call emos that live in the Bahamas? Tropical depressions. UPVOTE DOWNVOTE REPORT

My girlfriend lives a few miles away from me. The other night, she called me at around 3 AM. She was terrified. She said that there were two armed gunmen in her apartment. With all that adrenaline going through my system, it made it hard to go back to sleep.

you have a six minute timer to live but when you breath it resets

My doctor said I only have 1 year to live, so I killed him. Got sentenced to life in prison, problem solved!

Frank: I am named frank because my grandpa lived in Frankfurt during his best years. Finley: I am named Finley because my grandmother was in Finland during her early twenties! Mia: Can we please change the subject?