Like jokes
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef......haha.....no one likes my jokes.
Wood fired pizza?
How's pizza gonna pay child support now?! :O
Please drop a like.
What does an emo do on Halloween? They hang like a decoration.
*bowl of dark grapes*
Friend 1: I like my grapes how I like my men.
Friend 2: Black? Good one.
Friend 1: 21 at a time.
Why do emos like circles? Because they can hang out with them.
Kids are like a box of chocolates, they taste so good and you never know what you are going to get.
Roses are red, just like your lips.
Mountains are big, just like your tits.
Why do lions 🦁 go to SUBWAY 🥪?
Because they like to EAT FLESH.
I hate it when ever I bring a girl over, my parents don't care, but when I bring one of my friends that's a boy, they're like, "Keep the door open," and I'm gay.
Serial killers be like: "Blood is red, veins are blue, next one is YOU."
I would like to tell more jokes about 9/11, but they always crash and burn.
I want coffee like my men.
Dark.
If you're going shopping at school, what color would I like to smell: True or False?
I don't like 9/11 jokes because they always talk about how bad of a plane driver my dad is.
Bosses are like seagulls.
They fly in, make a lot of noise, crap all over everything, then fly out.
Sam and Amya like anal sex with each other.
What does a 90 year old's pussy taste like?
Depends...
Why did an old man fall in a well? Because he couldn’t see that well!
Why did the actor fall through the floorboards? They were going through a stage!
Why did a scarecrow win a Nobel prize? He was outstanding in his field!
Why are peppers the best at archery? Because they habanero!
What did the duck say after she bought chapstick? Put it on my bill!
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!
What did the three-legged dog say when he walked into a saloon? “I’m looking for the man who shot my paw!”
How do you tell the difference between a bull and a cow? It is either one or the udder!
What’s red and smells like blue paint? Red paint!
What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? One is very heavy, the other is a little lighter!
Like if you hate going to school.
In my house, good sex sounds like seals slapping each other.