Like jokes
Being a hooker shouldn't be illegal.
It's like having an Airbnb for your dick.
Why do lesbians shop at Sports Authority? Because they don’t like dicks.
Why are orphans so bad at poker?
They don’t know what a full house looks like.
How is a priest like a wristwatch?
They both start at 12.
Jokes are like Indians.
They never die, they just get reincarnated.
His name is Donald, but he looks like Goofy.
Me and my friend (rope) like hanging out.
Why does Yoda like to get molested? Because he likes the Force.
How is sex like a game of bridge?
If you have a great hand, you don’t need a partner.
What do u call a lesbian dinosaur?
I like alottopuss.
They say I’m sliced like the apples in a kids meal.
What do you call a train that likes toffee?
A chew-chew train.
Horrible Jokes, Part One- A friend of mine got into photographing salmon in different clothing. He said he liked shooting fish in apparel.
Hello, I am School Shooter Memes. For the last month I made School Shooter Jokes on the site, so now I want you guys to vote for the best one. It will be in a quarterfinal format with the 8 of them being the most liked. I will link all of the polls in the comments so make sure to vote for your favourite joke.
This bunny named Mason came up to a bar and ordered a beer and a burger. He sits at a table and the waiter brought a huge burger.
Mason: "Heh. Good thing I eat like a horse." He looks up at the waiter.
Waiter: "You are a nasty little bunny, aren't you?"
Mason screamed and ran away as the waiter chased him... she was a HORSE.
So I was at a restaurant and I really hit it off with the waitress, so one thing led to another and I'm at her place and she was really nice at the IHOP but when I was there with her she was all like "ahhh! what are you doing!?!?!? how did you get in my house?!?!?" and then she punched me and I'm the one who ended up in prison.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Or at least it does if you throw it hard enough.
Why is it that if you donate a kidney, people love you? But if you donate five kidneys, they call the police.
My senior relatives liked to tease me at weddings, saying things like, “You’ll be next!” They stopped once I started doing the same to them at funerals.
A cop pulls a man over and finds out he's drunk. So he asks for license and registration, and the drunk man says, "Can I see your flashlight?"
The cop says, "Just give me your license and registration." So drunk guy says, "Not until you give me your flashlight."
The cop said, "For what?" and the drunk guy says, "So I can shine it in your face and see what an asshole looks like."
What's green and smells like bacon?
Kermit's finger.
Look at a bag of black grapes. See how dark they are? That’s how I like my men.
25 at a time.