Like jokes
People are like sharks; only the great ones are white.
Free will is like having a vagina. You don't need to know how to use it, and you don't need to know what it does, but what matters is that you have it.
When you know you have a gay friend, but you find out that they like you!
If a furry looks like an animal, sounds like animal, and acts like an animal, can I run over it with my car like an animal?
Why is sex like math?
You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there’s no multiplying.
A man from France, a man from Britain, and a man from New York are on an expedition to the Amazon Forest. After a while, they get lost.
So as they are walking, suddenly the bushes jump up into the air and men with spears are there. One man says, "Hey, you're in our sacred land. So what we are going to do is skin you and then use your flesh to make canoes. But we aren’t that crazy so we will let you choose how you die."
The man from France said, "Bring me the poison." The man from Britain said, "Bring me the gun." And the man from New York said, "Bring me a gun as well!"
The guy was confused but still brought the items and gave them to them. The guy from France said, “For the France!” and drank the poison and died. The man from Britain said, “Long live the queen!” and shot himself and died. And the man from New York started shooting and laughing like a mad man and said. 3 men lived through this and one said to the others, "Well...sh!# that didn't go as planned."
Bitches be like "you're racist." You're right, and I'm gonna win.
Q: What does encyclopedia mean by cut them in triple?
A: Encyclopedia, more like "An Cyclone Media!"
Me after Taco Bell, "I’m about to blow this place up like September 11."
What did the taco say to the Sea Turtle? I like your shell!
Why does Michael Jackson like to play ping pong or table tennis? He likes to play with the little balls.
What do you call a man who likes rape jokes?
A fucking disgusting scumbag with no intelligence whatsoever. If you actually joke about this, you are the reason humanity has faded.
You look like something I drew with my left hand.
Like this joke. Ur mom.
The Titanic before the iceberg be like: "We can't go under it, we gotta go through it!"
My 3 year old sister kept saying, "I like your cut, G." Every time she does, I dodge and close my eyes, but she's the one who always ends up running.
Michael Jackson is like if a Barbie doll and Bruno Mars had an ugly child together!
I'm jk btw Michael Jackson was amazing!
Russia be like we're strong, gets ass beat up by a comedian with a hook nose...
#i stand with Ukraine 🇺🇦
Juice WRLD farts smell like McDonalds.
Nuns be like: Can I spread the word, but check for you?