Like jokes

You know how there were like... two towers. I had so much fun playing Jenga in those planes! I WON!!!!!

Parents are like food—not all kids get them.

Looks like the gene pool in your family is about three inches deep.

Why does a heterosexual man swallow the sperm of another man after he has given him a brojob?

Because of the cream filling inside, just like the individually wrapped cakes of Hostess Twinkies.

Why did the guitar teacher get arrested?

He fingered A minor (get it, like the chord A minor)?

What instrument do people like to listen to while having sex?

A sex-a-phone.

I was in the car, and I got out and saw a deer walking sexy, and I'm like, "What the..."

I like my Oreos how I like my victims... Drowning.

My wife is like a mirror.

I can never look at it.

I hate this website. It sucks. Like if you agree!

I am only here because me no like Blues Clues LGBTQ episode as I don’t believe in that. If you do, ok.

And it shouldn’t be a month, the month should be for all of the war veterans, it should be a day for pride. Companies only use this month for money; it’s exploitation because they don’t truly support, unlike me, in which I don’t support it.

Yo momma's like a cloud, when she disappears, it's a beautiful sunny day.

Imagine this scenario: a doctor walks in and tells the patient that he has all the illnesses in the world like this: "You have depression, diarrhea, cancer,... etc." and then the last one on the list is that he is deaf.

Teacher: We are going to Seville.

Girls: Omg, it's such a beautiful city. I can't wait to explore!

Boys: Ohh oh oh ohhh.

Omg thanks for 1000 likes!

When you say to your dad...

AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

Dad be like...

Who wants my son?

Nan be like, "Me!"

Kid be like...

AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH GIVE ME #### ROUX!

What are roux, says nan?

Um, they're your life savings!

Nan be like, "Let's get some roux!"

Carly (😊): What a beautiful day, huh?

Bianca (😔): Yes, for you it is.

Carly (😟): What's wrong?

Bianca (😕): Nothing, nothing at all...

Carly (😠): Don't lie to me...

Carly (🤔): Hmmm... Jordan???

Carly (😈): Because if so, I can take him out like this...

Bianca (😔🙄😒): Thank you... no... and I don't give a damn anymore!

Carly (😠): Bianca, trust me, you don't love him anyway!

Bianca (😒): Please, Carlyana, please keep your fucking face out of this.

Carly (😈): No need to curse, I can do that to Jordan if you want...

Bianca (😔): Well... shut your mouth and leave me alone!

Toast is like parents.

If they are both black, you have nothing to eat.

Emos are weird to me because they dress up all black, and you know I don't like that, so that's why I don't like it.

Your hairline bent like the relationship with your mom and dad.

Why does Donald Trump smell like dog shit? Cuz he's a dawg!