Like jokes
Did you know that chips taste like the baked potato in things called bags of chips?
What's the difference between you and Frankenstein?
He is not ugly like you; plus, he has a wife.
Your mom is like a penny: two-faced, flat, and always in someone's pants.
Hoes be like, "I've been through a lot."
No, a lot's been through you.
Did you know, the average gay person likes men?
Gen Z is most likely going to be the last generation who felt the pain of getting up early to catch their favorite show.
JFK and Abraham Lincoln were terrible presidents. It's like their heads were empty.
Why did the emo kid like the all black Oreos?
'Cause they're dark.
L bozos fell like my grandma on the stairs.
Your hairline is so far back you look like Frankenstein.
TEST QUESTION: what looks like half an apple?
My cousin: the other half.
Russians be like: "bfddrhnnkhsaxbjk speak English!"
Putin be like, Finland and Sweden are bullying me with NATO, the same NATO that can't even reload a gun! Russians are pussies!
Putin be like CSGO is much harder in real life!
Russia be like we're strong, gets ass beat up by a comedian with a hook nose...
#i stand with Ukraine 🇺🇦
Putin be like that boat is now a submarine!
Trump likes to grab 'em by the pussy. Putin likes to grab them by their tiny hands.
Why do Orphans like school?
Because they don't have a home to go back to afterwards.
So I went to my friend's house and he told me to make myself at home, so I kicked him out. I don't like visitors.
My cousin: Brother, I lost in a game of Call of Duty: Moe Bill [he was supposed to pronounce it as mobile; however, I left it as it is].
Me: So tell me about it then.
My cousin: I lost to Sum_Baldi.
Me: Somebody? Don’t they have, like, the name of you opponents?
My cousin: No, no, no, the name was Sum_Baldi. S.U.M_B.A.L.D.I.
Me: Ok, my bad. Continue.
My cousin: I got Sum_Baldi, and 5 seconds later, I got kill[ed] by Sum_Fing_Wong.
Me: It’s not wrong! In Call of Duty, you are suppose to kill or be killed.
My cousin: No, no, no, the name was Sum_Fing_Wong. S.U.M_F.I.N.G_W.O.N.G.
Me: My bad again. Do continue.
My cousin: I got so angry I blow[ed] up.
Me: So you got blowed up, by what weapon?
My cousin: By the game.
Me: [was not expecting that for an answer]