Your life, that's all.
I was born yesterday, and I walked down memory lane. I fell over the edge!
I went to the store, and yeah...
What did the fish say to the other fish?
"I want my life to be H2O-ver!"
What day should you drink water?
Thursday, Thirstday!
Fun fact: If you're an orphan, you probably don't know your parents.
What's worse than a failed suicide, you ask?
I fail suicide because you forgot to do the dishes and your parents come after you and they're the ones to kill you, not yourself.
Life is karma... because I was born, God gifted me with social awkwardness, sh*t athletic skills, and stupidity.
Quote of the day:
A bad attitude is like a flat tire. You can't go anywhere until you change it.
Chao!!!
What’s the difference between a microwave and a 10 year old girl?
The microwave doesn’t fart out blood and diarrhea when you pull your meat out.
If R. Kelly was a therapist:
14 year old: I hate my life.
R. Kelly: I feel you.
Are you a gun because I want to live with you?
What's the similarity between an orphan and my dick?
They both will die alone.
Why do my kids die?
Stinky Oussy :D
Life is a bitch, and people make it worse.
This thing that I'm in ("am") is a forsaken curse (beta).
Hi, oooo was the day I was a kid. I was going home to school today after dinner!
What's the difference between an orphan and a dew?
One goes up and one goes down.
Hello everyone! I just came back! How are things going?
Life is like a game of poker, guys start by going with them clubs, ladies follow with a set of hearts, guys put down the diamonds, and before you know it you got a full house.
When you think of the word "simp," you think of a girl. "Girl" stands for ghosts in real life. Another word for simp is "ding dong." Put them together, and you get ghosts in real life with ding dongs.
