Life jokes
I know everything about Walt Disney! How he died, how his mom and dad died, how his kids died, when he was born, where he was born, and how he was born. 😏
Why was the orphan so successful? Because when they were told “go big or go home,” they only had one option.
Not a joke?
More like not an existing organism in life.
I laughed at my life so hard.
I say these jokes are life saving material. Who's with me?
Someone: "I got chickens out there vibin'."
Me: "What? Oh, you mean those over-sized chickens that just show an example of you in real life?"
Someone: . . .
If you think your life is bad, then people are discussing the gender of Mr. Potato Head.
What happened when the emo kid gave the tree a high five? It left him hanging.
Why is death taken so lightly?
Because you can take it so quickly.
Why is death taken so lightly?
Because anyone can take it.
What type of tea is hard to swallow?
Reality.
We forge the chains we wear in life.
What type of jokes do you tell an orphan?
Family jokes.
What do you call an orphan?
Kyan.
What do you call a pig that does Karate?
End everything and your life, Steven Roca!
Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn’t last as long for fat people.
What can you say about that homeless man's life and current status?
Wasted.
Orphan: "I get all the A pluses and y'all bad!"
And then I told him: "If you feel so special, try telling your parents. You can't, can you?"
Dad: I'll pay you 10 bucks for every day you don't tell a lie.
Next day:
Dad: Son, what's the ugliest thing you've ever seen?
Son: That ugly face of yours, go get a life, gosh, Dad, you're embarrassing.
The dad sulked for 3 whole years.
Proof that words really can hurt.