Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the car.
Law Jokes
Why did the orphan rob the bank?
So they could be wanted.
Why couldn't an eagle do a barrel roll? It's oblivious, it's il-eagle.
I'm still not sure how I'm not in jail or have been fined for littering. When I was born, I was born in a hospital trash can, therefore making me a literal piece of trash. That being said, any time I'm out in public, I'm a piece of litter.
You know why pedophiles get away with molesting children?
Because who are they gonna tell? Not their parents.
We should stop.
Wait, but who is the orphan going to tell?
The boomerang!
Bowling is like child support: it involves balls.
I'd hit you, but if I did, I'd go to jail for animal abuse.
What happens to an orphan that gets on house arrest?
They get set free.
Rape: The only crime where you have to tell the victim they couldn't do anything even if they could run or say something, then after, are told rapists stop them doing something about it.
My doctor said I only have 1 year to live, so I killed him. Got sentenced to life in prison, problem solved!
Why did the duck get arrested?
He tried to quack a safe.
Why do orphans want to be criminals? Because they want to feel what it’s like to be wanted.
One thing about disabled people is they never set foot in prison.
You marry a single mother with an adult daughter. Now, your father marries the daughter. So, your father is your son now, because he is married to your daughter-in-law. But as your father's son and your father's father, you're your own grandpa!
It's not easy to make good pedophilia jokes, because it's a very touchy subject.
In America, 1 in 10 houses has a paedophile.
Not me, I live next to a smoking hot 8-year-old.
Alvin and the Chipmunks commit war crimes.
What is one good thing about pedophiles?
They drive slow in the school zone.
Why did the orphan become a killer?
Because he knew they would not look for him.
