Broke my toenail yesterday, I'm now presenting you puns/jokes:
1. "Yeah I broke my toenail, wanna see phoTOES?" 2. "I'm tired of bandaging my toe! Oh. My. GAUZE."
I'm starting a clown shoe store. It's no small feat :oD
What's black and screams?
Stevie Wonder answering the iron.
whats the best thing about an abortion joke?? no one gets offended
You: “Knock knock” Person: “Who’s there?” You: “Leaf” Person: “Leaf who?” You: “Leaf this house”
*Apple bottom jeans plays”
kid "whats dark humor" mom "you see that man over there without arms tell him to clap" kid "I am blind mom" "exactly" said mom
Read this slow : i 1 2 4 Q
Why was tickle me Elmo upset when he left the factory? Because they only gave him one test tickle
my mom said to take out the trash bags so i did and the next day my mom asked "where are your sisters?" i said "in line to get crushed"
These murder jokes are just KILLING me!
Knock Knock! Who's there? King Tut! King Tut who? King Tutty Fried Chicken!
3 men were captured by a tribe and tortured. The leader of the tribe tells them that they would live, only if they could achieve one thing. They had to go out and find 10 pieces of the same fruit each. The first person returned with apples, the leader said that he had to put all 10 of them up into his ass without making a sound, or he would be killed. 1....2 he screamed. The next person came back with grapes, 1,2,3, he counted up to 8, but began to burst out laughing, he was killed. In heaven, the first man asked him why he laughed if he was doing so well, "well i saw the third guy coming back with fucking pineapples"
me running after slapping the emo kid's wrist and saying i like ya cut g
Q:What did the cannibal say to the leper?
A:You gonna eat that?
My only friend who actually cares: Stop making suicide jokes, I’m really concerned!
Me: Okay I’ll cut it out.
when your deppresed about the world :( but you remember you will soon die :)
How is a push-up bra like a bag of chips? As soon as you open it, you realize it’s half empty.
Ruin a quote by attributing it to the wrong person "Don't cry because it is over. Smile because it happened." -Adolf Hitler, 1945
POV you are drunk and telling jokes and know one is listening 😭😭😭
Joker gives batman a phone thomas:uhh son we need to talk... about the uhh dressing up. martha:hello dearie brucie is it ok if you visit me when you go to jokers house
