Lates jokes
A man and a child walk into the woods. The child turns to the man and says, "Mister, can we go home? It's getting late, and I'm scared to walk home."
The man turns to the child and says, "How do you think I feel? I have to walk home alone!"
You know why the teacher punished Dairy Milk?
Answer: Because he was choco_'late' to school.
Albert is a homophobic guy. His cousin Franco is also a homophobic guy.
Albert's aunt and cousin have visited his parents, but Albert didn't know that because he came late at night. Franco was sleeping in Albert's bed, thinking he would not come home. Albert laid on his bed, thinking there was no one on it, and then they started fucking ^_*
No phobia lasts forever 👌😂
Why is time important? To not be late.
About to go on a date.
But she was late.
So I got some tape.
And eventually punished her with rape.
My mom and dad got home from a party pretty late. Why do I know? Because I was playing Minecraft all night.
Anyways, they get home and start fumbling up the stairs and being really loud. I could have swore I heard them fall down. I assumed they were drunk. I was just playing my Switch when they come into my room. Now I'm about 10 at the time so I watch them get undressed IN MY FUCKING BED! I then just stare at them as they notice me before I witness anything. They say that they were doing "intense kissing" the next morning. I believed that at the time, but now I've been to health class. I now know the truth. I wish I hadn't.
My dad came over late at night. He was drunk. He started telling me how useless I was. Then I went to the kitchen, grabbed a knife, and stabbed him in the chest 47 times.
Three minutes later, he died. Now I’m losing my mind and cutting myself.
I'm late for my interview! Do you know where the nearest sex offender registry is?
Ahmed is "bombuni guisisni" and Marcus is "bombardilo crocodilo" because Ahmed was late to the plane party and Marcus was first.
What do you call a rapper who's always late?
Time Rhyme.
I asked the librarian if they had any books on anxiety.
She replied with, "Won't you worry a lot about returning it late?"
2, 4, 6, 8, you're staying up too late.
2, 4, 6, 8, all I do is master bait.
If a sped is late for class, is it wrong to call them tardy?
Why were the Twin Towers mad? Because they ordered pizzas and they only got plain: one came late, and then went to the wrong location.
On September 11, Gemini ordered three pepperoni pizzas.
One came alone, one was late, and the third went the wrong way.
I hate "the woke" so much, I got mad when my mom said I "woke" up late for school.
When you were late to school and your teacher called you tardy, she meant that in more ways than one.
Why was the rapper always late?
Because he had to drop his kids off at the Rhyme Bus.
What do you say when Jack's late to sex ed?
"Aye-jack-you-late!"
Ever tried looking in a mirror lately? I wouldn't, your crooked hairline might break it.