Language jokes
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Candace. Candace who? Candace be true, you don’t remember me?
I have a joke about paper. It's tearable.
What is your name? What am I pointing at? 👃🏽 And what am I holding? Hahaha!!!!! Knows nothing.
What starts with F and ends with uck? Firetruck, what were you thinking?
What is heavy forward but not backward?
I love the word legs.
Wanna help me spread the word?
Spell "attic."
Okay. A-T-T-I-C. /a titi/ tata. I see.
Once at school, a teacher thought I was Russian. Why do you think that? I said. The teacher replied, because you're reading from Right to Left.
Once, asked if I played Scrabble, being dyslexic, I asked if it was the standard version or the deluxe dyslexic version.
I'm dyslexic. My sister was reading, "What's the book?" I asked. She showed me the cover. "You reading 'The Scared Bull'?" I asked. She started laughing. "No, 'The Sacred Bull'!"
Spell fuzz.
Okay, F-U-Z-Z, which also, it sounds like "F U Z's."
What do you call a surprised Chinese man?
Answer: Ho Lee Fuk.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Broccoli.
Broccoli who?
Broccoli hasn’t got a surname!
Ma name is Bendover.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
My name is Ach.
Ach who?
Bless you!
I don’t like the term "rape," I prefer: "struggle snuggle."
What is Juan the junkmail dispenser's nickname? Spic and spam.
Your Roblox friend counts to 10, but she doesn't count to "too." Then Roblox says: "Damn. Your Roblox friend can't count."
America: Saying, "I beg your pardon" in British English is like saying; "What did you say to me you orphaned big forehead shitty ass small dick bitch?"
UK: You Americans are so fucking rude.
America: Oh, I'm SoRrY mIsTeR fAnCy PaNts 👖
Did you hear about the German girl being raped by 10 men? She shouted, "nein, nein," so one of them left.