Language jokes
I have a joke about paper. It's tearable.
What is your name? What am I pointing at? 👃🏽 And what am I holding? Hahaha!!!!! Knows nothing.
What starts with F and ends with uck? Firetruck, what were you thinking?
What is heavy forward but not backward?
I love the word legs.
Wanna help me spread the word?
Spell "attic."
Okay. A-T-T-I-C. /a titi/ tata. I see.
Once at school, a teacher thought I was Russian. Why do you think that? I said. The teacher replied, because you're reading from Right to Left.
Once, asked if I played Scrabble, being dyslexic, I asked if it was the standard version or the deluxe dyslexic version.
I'm dyslexic. My sister was reading, "What's the book?" I asked. She showed me the cover. "You reading 'The Scared Bull'?" I asked. She started laughing. "No, 'The Sacred Bull'!"
Spell fuzz.
Okay, F-U-Z-Z, which also, it sounds like "F U Z's."
What do you call a surprised Chinese man?
Answer: Ho Lee Fuk.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Broccoli.
Broccoli who?
Broccoli hasn’t got a surname!
Ma name is Bendover.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
My name is Ach.
Ach who?
Bless you!
I don’t like the term "rape," I prefer: "struggle snuggle."
What is Juan the junkmail dispenser's nickname? Spic and spam.
Your Roblox friend counts to 10, but she doesn't count to "too." Then Roblox says: "Damn. Your Roblox friend can't count."
America: Saying, "I beg your pardon" in British English is like saying; "What did you say to me you orphaned big forehead shitty ass small dick bitch?"
UK: You Americans are so fucking rude.
America: Oh, I'm SoRrY mIsTeR fAnCy PaNts 👖
Did you hear about the German girl being raped by 10 men? She shouted, "nein, nein," so one of them left.
Why isn’t the word “orphan” spelled with an “f” instead of “ph?” Because that “f” stands for “family,” and the word “orphan” doesn’t have a family.