Language jokes
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What number is better than 69?
88 'cause you get ate twice.
Why can’t English people play chess? They ain't got no queen.
My three favorite things are eating my family and not using commas.
What did the mama moose say to the calf after it got on her nerves?
"I'm not a-moosed right now."
What does a French guy say when he falls off?
Oh no, Eiffel!
It’s important to establish a good vocabulary.
If I had known the difference between the words “antidote” and “anecdote,” one of my best friends would still be alive.
Why shouldn’t you call people in China?
Because there are so many Wings and Wongs you might "wing" the wrong number.
I am on the German website.
Put Helen Keller in George Floyd's position. How would she cry out for help? Would she just moan, or would she try to do sign language?
What should you do if you meet a giant? Use big words.
What's a pirate's favorite letter? You'd think it's the "R," but it's really the "C."
When does Friday come before Thursday?
In the dictionary.
So, you're into pronouns? Let me she/them titties.
I have made a new word: Plagiarism.
Why do we tell actors to break a leg?
Cause every play has a cast.
Be careful what you say around Indians, the red dot means they're recording.
Hey guys! Want to know something cool? Google Jesus' language. It's Aramaic.
Next, google "God in Aramaic". See the results for yourself. <3
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Utah.
Utah who?
You're talking to me.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Candace. Candace who? Candace be true, you don’t remember me?