Know

Know jokes

Son

8 views ·

Son: Dad, what's a morbid joke?

Father: Walk over to a homeless man and throw a rock at him, then you will know.

Son: But Dad, I don't have arms or legs.

Father: Now you know.

Hill

18 views ·

Jack and Jill went up a hill to smoke some mairawanah.

Jack got high and grabbed her thigh and said, "I know you wanna," but dumb-ass Jill forgot her pills, and now they have 12 kids.

Orphan

6 views ·

Orphan: *crying* You: Do you know where your parents are? Orphan: No. Your Friend: They don't have parents!!! You: 😂 I know.

Fridge

4 views ·

My wife left a note on the fridge. The note read, "It's not working." I don't know what she's talking about. I opened the fridge, and it worked fine!

Kid

Hello, if you don't know me (which you probably don't), my name is watersharky, or WS, or Shark.

I am a normal, weird kid/preteen, and that's it. If you want more info on me, I will gladly share! Shark out.

Skeleton

3 views ·

- What did the skeleton say to his friend?

- Actually... TIBIA honest, I don't know how to complete this joke...

Twin Towers

111 views ·

I was confused when they asked me, "Do you know how to fly a plane?" Then, when I said, "No," they said, "Perfect!"

Snail

13 views ·

A turtle was walking down the street when all of a sudden a snail came up to him and robbed him.

When the policemen showed up and asked him what happened, he responded, "I don't know, it all happened so fast!"

Hitler

61 views ·

You know Hitler loves you when he comes up to you on Valentine's Day and he says, "Will you be my Valenein?"

Pedophile

57 views ·

Did you know that, statistically, 1 in 10 people live next door to a pedophile? Not me though, not me though; I live next door to a lil 10 year old boy with a FAT ASS yenno what I'm sayin'???

  • 5
  • Boyfriend

    12 views ·

    What is a kind thing to say to someone and what is a rude thing to say to someone?

    Kind thing to say to someone: You are the most perfect you there is. Your outlook on life is amaz- (BLAH, BLAH, BLAH ENOUGH!)

    Rudist thing to say too someone: You more uglyer than my mama's boyfriend. You are a son of a b word! Okay that is so much rude and why you can say that to a tree but anyway not the point. Bonus: The world's most weirdest name to say to a girl, is Nutter butter, we know that's a weird *and* stupid name because she is not nutter or butter she is a person not a thing! Oh well bye!!!!

    Gay

    36 views ·

    John saw a Gay in a wheelchair.

    "I didn't know a man could be a fruit and a Vegetable!"

  • 2
  • Teacher

    36 views ·

    A teacher asked a class who killed Goliath. The first pupil said he wasn’t the one. The second said he doesn’t know. No one knew in the class.

    The teacher got furious and dashed to the Head Master’s office to report. Immediately, the head master followed him back to the class with a cane. He growled- “If no one tells me who killed Goliath in this class, you will see fire!” Everyone in the class insisted on the fact that it wasn’t them.

    Then the Head master looked at the teacher and said- “Mr. Dapo, are you sure that the person who killed Goliath is in this class?” The teacher fainted.

    Teacher

    146 views ·

    A teacher asks her class, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” Little Johnny says “I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best b*tch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day.”

    The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with the bad behavior of the child, decides not to give importance to what he said and then continues the lesson. “And you, Susie?” the teacher asks. Susie says “I wanna be Johnny’s b*tch.”

    Priest

    27 views ·

    Man: I must confess, Father.

    Priest: What are you here to confess?

    Man: I hit my wife and blamed her for what happened to our son.

    Priest: And what happened to your son?

    Man: He said a man raped him.

    Priest: When and where did this happen?

    Man: A local church. I don't know which one.

    Priest: ...By whom?

    Man: A priest, he said. He said the priest had black hair and blue eyes, kind of like you.

    Priest: ...Shit