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Know jokes

Twin

One weekend some distant family members that I hadn't met before came over. My cousins (who I also hadn't met before) were fighting, so I decided to separate them and place them in opposite corners of the room (thinking it would help).

My mom took me to an empty room with tears in her eyes and told me they both ended up dying.

Well, SO-RRY, but I didn't know they were conjoined twins.

God

Hello, this is Godlygirl26. I want to help people with their problems no matter what. There is nothing that God cannot do. I want y'all to know that God is with you, not any of those stone or wood "gods" but a true, loving, powerful God. DM this right here and I will answer. Hope I can help you! Love, Godlygirl26.

Pedophile

Did you know that, statistically, 1 in 10 people live next door to a pedophile? Not me though, not me though; I live next door to a lil 10 year old boy with a FAT ASS yenno what I'm sayin'???

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  • Dream

    "Never gonna give, never gonna give (Give you up) We've known each other for so long Your heart's been aching, but You're too shy to say it Inside, we both know what's been going on We know the game and we're gonna play it I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling Gotta make you understand Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you." mucho_mango: just woke up from my dream what was that.

    Baby

    How many time does it take to cook a baby in a microwave?

    I don’t know, I can’t count while masturbating.

    Memes

    Body

    What's the difference between a pile of dead bodies and a computer?

    I don't know, I have both!

    Neighbor

    I got up one day; my neighbor was in my house and was going to take me and my mom out. I showed my mom and my neighbor a trick. They both liked it. I asked my neighbor, "Do you know any tricks?" He said, "Yes, in matter of fact, I could tell you what your mom had for breakfast." I said, "How?" Well, my neighbor licked my mom's ass and ate her pussy out in front of me. He told me my mom had pancakes. So we were in the car; I asked my neighbor, "How did you know what my mom had pancakes for breakfast?" My neighbor said, "Well, that is what your mom made me while we were waiting for you to get up."

    Pokemon

    POKEMON THEME SONG JOKE: I wanna be the berry best, like no one ever was.

    To bitch them is my real pest, to brain them in my toss. I will gravel across the land, perching war and wide. Fuse Pokemon to under-strand, the lower that's in psyche.

    Poke him on! Gotta joke them all it's Fru and me, All I know is my dress tiny, Poke him on! Yeah, you're my pest friend, In a world you must de-blend, Poke him on!

    Gotta joke them all my shirts so true, My outrage will flush us through. You bitch me and I ditch you, P-O-K-E-M-O-N!!!

    Gotta joke them all, Gotta joke them all!

    Poke him on!

    Plane

    Twin Towers

    I was confused when they asked me, "Do you know how to fly a plane?" Then, when I said, "No," they said, "Perfect!"

    Blind Person

    Blind

    How does a blind person know they've wiped their ass enough?

    Son

    Son: Dad, what's a morbid joke?

    Father: Walk over to a homeless man and throw a rock at him, then you will know.

    Son: But Dad, I don't have arms or legs.

    Father: Now you know.

    Orphan

    Why do orphans love getting r@ped?

    Because they want to know what love feels like.

    Fridge

    My wife left a note on the fridge. The note read, "It's not working." I don't know what she's talking about. I opened the fridge, and it worked fine!

    Hill

    Jack and Jill went up a hill to smoke some mairawanah.

    Jack got high and grabbed her thigh and said, "I know you wanna," but dumb-ass Jill forgot her pills, and now they have 12 kids.

    Orphan

    Orphan: *crying* You: Do you know where your parents are? Orphan: No. Your Friend: They don't have parents!!! You: 😂 I know.

    Kid

    Hello, if you don't know me (which you probably don't), my name is watersharky, or WS, or Shark.

    I am a normal, weird kid/preteen, and that's it. If you want more info on me, I will gladly share! Shark out.

    Hitler

    You know Hitler loves you when he comes up to you on Valentine's Day and he says, "Will you be my Valenein?"