I was shocked when I found out my toaster wasn't waterproof.
What is red and white and goes 200 mph?
A baby in a blender.
What's red, green, and goes 90 miles an hour?
A frog in a blender.
What do you call a can opener that doesn't work? A can't opener.
What do dead babies and fruit have in common? Both can become smoothies with the help of a blender!
How do you put a baby in the blender feet first so you can see its facial expressions?
How do you get it out? Tortilla chip.
The most confusing day of my life was when I found out my toaster was waterproof.
What did the mayonnaise say when the refrigerator door was opened? Close the door, I'm dressing.
What is red and very rare?
A child in a blender.
Me: I know how to use a microwave!
Also me: Mom! The microwave is on fire!
Is your oven running?
Then you better go catch it!
Just got a new internet connected toaster. It wouldn't work until I enabled pop-ups!
How do you fit a whale inside a car? A blender.
What’s red and goes 100 miles per hour?
Babies in a blender.
Microwave.
Leprechauns are stupid. No joke.
Are you a toaster?
How do you get a baby into a small bowl?
A blender.
How do you get it out? Tostito chips.
Why do brides wear white?
So they match the kitchen appliances.
There are two muffins baking in the oven. One muffin says to the other, “Phew, is it getting hot in here or is it just me?”
The other muffin says, “AAAAHHH!! A TALKING MUFFIN!”
What is red and green and goes 100 miles per hour?
A frog in a blender.
