Stove

Stove Jokes

Grandfather

Grandfather's last words: "Stop shaking the ladder, you cunt!"

Grandmother's last words: "You know how to use that hammer."

Dad's last words: "Always aim before you shoot that gun."

Mom's last words: "Turn off the stove when you're done."

My last thought: Am I a murderer?

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  • Terrorist

    What did the terrorist think to himself seconds before hitting the tower?

    "Did I leave the stove on?"

    Foot

    Why are all women's feet small? So they can stand closer to the stove.

    Water

    How to make holy water:

    1. Grab a pot.

    2. Put water in it.

    3. Set the stove to 420 degrees.

    4. Boil the hell out of it.

    Plane Crash

    What did Pavol Demitra think before the Yaroslavl plane hit the ground?

    "Oh shit, did I leave the stove on at home?"

    Steak

    Someone asked me, "How would you like your steak cooked?"

    I said, "On a stove!"