Teacher: Ok kids, time to go home.
The orphan: What is home?
Teacher: Here, I have somewhere for you.
*puts in trash can*
Kids Jokes
Tired kid with asthma: "It's hard to breathe."
Gym Teacher: "That's alright."
Other Kid: "Hush!"
What do you call your kids?
Dude, ABC, what comes next?
Kid: A big fat noob.
Why do apple trees like emo kids?
Because they like to play yoyo with them.
Kid !: What are you doin? Kid 2: Laying in my bed! Kid 1: Naked? Kid 2: Yes Ld 1: Show me! Kid 2: Its dark! Kid 1: Still show me! Kid 2 Ok-
I went up to the deaf kid and said, "I’m going to punch you in 3, 2, 1." And he ended up with a broken nose, and I said, "You should have listened to me!"
What is the difference between an emo kid and a jug of milk?
The milk doesn't hang itself after it gets dumped.
I got sent to the principal's office for telling the kid in the wheelchair to stand up for himself.
Kids are cute, not even joking. Wanking is easy around them.
So I was looking through my pictures and I found a picture of a random kid that took a picture of his ugly face. It looked like someone that got hit by a car, then a bus, then a semi.
That’s what I get for not having a password on my iPad.
Man: Could you hold this for me?
Kid: Ok mister! I love playing with a pew pew! Pow! Pew! Pew! Bang! *GUNSHOT*
Man: Dammit, now who am I gonna put in the van?!
What do you call someone who kisses primary school kids?
Joshua Metcalfe
How many fat people are in my house?
20, counting the kids in the basement.
Dad: My kid just said "butch," but since he is a kid, he said a bad word on accident.
*The next day*
Uncle: F*CK!
Jack and his kids went to the lake, and his mother wants him to go swimming. You know what he says? "Back where you came from!"
What do you call a bunch of biracial, retarded kids? The Special Olympics.
What do you call a Down syndrome kid who has been physically abused by older teenagers and her parents for a total of 16 years and has red marks all over their body?
Not funny because Down syndrome jokes aren't funny ;)
What do you call a bruised banana?
A school bus full of his kids.
Kidnapper: Hey kid, your mom told me to follow me.
Orphan: But I don't have a mom!
Why do emo kids not run? Because their bodies will tear apart from the bones from all the cuts.
