Kids jokes
I asked this kid for a high five, but he could not reach my hand.
I was bullying a little kid for having a purple eye and said, "Where'd you get that? Your mom? Your dad?"
After that, everyone in my group was laughing at the kid. The next day I never saw him again.
The police: Pull over!
The kid: Do you know who my dad is?
The police: What, your mom did not tell you?
Hey, Squidward, say "kid" backward. Also, suck my dick!
Girl, are you a public school? Because I want to shoot my kids inside you.
Memes
I saw a kid in a wheelchair, and he was getting bullied. I said, "Stand up for yourself!"
Teacher: Anyone missing?
Orphan: My parents.
Teacher: Something that is real, kid.
Orphan: My family.
Teacher: OMG, out of my classroom, kid!
Cousin: Hahaha, I am their biological parent.
Kid: So what? At least they love me more.
What do blind kids and orphans have in common?
They can't see their parents.
A friend of mine told me something that I cannot forget, and I am now traumatized to hell. The next day a kid was set for an amber alert that looked exactly like my DEAR friend! :)
Emo kids are so good at kicking football. I hear they have good hang time.
I saw some kids bullying a kid in a wheelchair. I grabbed the kid, pushed him down the stairs, and said, "GTA physics."
Kid: Knock knock!
Orphan: Who's there?
Kid: Not your parents XD
Kid: Your mom!
Orphan: (cries)
Kid says, “Are you a soldier?”
Soldier says, “Mhm.”
Kid says, “I wanna be a soldier someday.”
Soldier says, “Really?”
The kid says, “Yeah, but father says I don’t have the balls to be a soldier, but he’s right. I’m a FUCKING PRETTY PRETTY PRINCESS!!!"
Dude, ABC, what comes next?
Kid: A big fat noob.
Man: Could you hold this for me?
Kid: Ok mister! I love playing with a pew pew! Pow! Pew! Pew! Bang! *GUNSHOT*
Man: Dammit, now who am I gonna put in the van?!
How many fat people are in my house?
20, counting the kids in the basement.
Dad: My kid just said "butch," but since he is a kid, he said a bad word on accident.
*The next day*
Uncle: F*CK!
Teacher: Ok kids, time to go home.
The orphan: What is home?
Teacher: Here, I have somewhere for you.
*puts in trash can*