Kids jokes
What do you call an epileptic kid?
Little Seizures.
What do you call a bunch of biracial, retarded kids? The Special Olympics.
If a man kills a kid, it's called Murder.
If a woman kills a kid, it's called Reproductive Rights.
What did the kid with leukemia watch last night? Finding Chemo.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special Forces.
Bro, I gave a suicidal kid Nikes... he just did it, lol.
I told my kids to smile with the monkeys in the open zoo.
They never got together at all.
If you have an emo kid army, they'll kill themselves before they get to the field.
One day, the fat kid came up to me and asked me, "What's cracking?" The floorboards, you idiot. You're causing a 9.7 Richter scale earthquake and asking ME what's cracking. It would be best if you looked down for a second.
Put a kid in a wheelchair in the Twin Towers. Damn, I love Hot Wheels!
I got suspended for asking an emo kid if he wants to hang out with me.
When you're the only one bullying the weird kid and you're absent on the day he shoots up the school. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
The emo kid tried to high five the tree.
But the tree left him hanging.
How does a kid with no arms or legs like a video on YouTube when they say smash the like button?
They literally smash the like button "uuuuuugghghhhgBANG!"
I was at work yesterday and I saw this kid crying. I went up to him and asked him where his parents were, and he started to cry even more. Gosh, don't you just love working at the orphanage?
Teacher: Kids, what does a chicken give you?
Students: Eggs.
Teacher: Very good. Now, what does the pig give you?
Kids: Bacon.
Teacher: Excellent. Now, what does the fat cow give you?
Kids: Homework.
How do you punish blind kids?
Put them in a round room and tell them to sit in the corner.
Are you a school? Because I want to shoot a bunch of kids in you.
Why was the American kid late to school?
Because he was too busy putting on his bulletproof vest.
So a kid was hanging out with his mom and this man comes up to him and said, "Hi, I'm your new dad." The kid did not think about it, and then he did and said, "But I already have a dad." The mom said, "That was not your real dad."