Kid jokes
Why did the kid throw the clock out the window? He wanted to see time fly.
One day I was saw a kid sitting on the curb dressed in rags. I asked if he was an orphan. He said, “Yeah, what gave me away?” I said, “His parents.”
Kid: Imagine being an orphan!
Parents: Look who's talking, not you 'cause you ain't got no one to talk to! *vanishes*
Kid: WAIT, WHAT!
I bullied a kid in a wheelchair. I told him to stand up for himself.
I have to say that Halloween is my favorite day...
Every time they see me, kids and mothers run away...
I don’t have a costume so please don’t reprimand...
When I open up the door, I’ve got my penis in my hand.
Memes
What's the most confusing day of the year for an illegitimate kid?
Father's Day.
Why do you let your dads sleep so they don't get grumpy and eat your dinner?
Did you know the "f" in "orphan" stands for family?
Kid: There is no "f" in "orphan."
There is no family.
What's an orphan's least favorite day? Take your kid to work day.
Why can’t you trust an emo kid?
'Cause they always leave you hanging.
What famous book writer for kids loved insects?
Beatrix Potter.
One day I asked my mom where kids came from. She said the man who went to the milk store.
Five years later, he came back and left again.
Prankster kid: Knock knock.
Neighbor: Who's there?
...
Not many people know this, but Soulja Boy was the lead role in a very successful children's movie a while ago. Released to theaters nationwide in 2006 was Honey, I Crunked the Kids.
*School Shooter Walks In*
That one kid who plays "Pumped Up Kicks" at max volume.
What hit the ground first in a tree, a leaf or an emo kid?
The leaf, because an emo kid got a rope to save him!
POV: Me going to jail after giving the orphan kid a computer without the motherboard.
Why is the older brother's kid brother that has autism always performing fellatio on his older brother?
Because he wants to find out how many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop.
A bully says, "I get 10x more girls than you" to a gay kid.
Then the gay kid says, "10 X 0 is still 0."
For some reason a group of emo kids are following me because I gave them a Happy Meal.