Justice jokes
I was taking a walk near the prison when I saw a good looking guy climbing down the fence, and when he noticed me, he gave me a sneer! It was pretty condescending.
My undergrad was killer. It was murder in the first degree.
What did the first rape victim say to the second rape victim?
"You are a consequence of rape!"
A drunk walks out of a bar late at night and sees a nun walking past on the footpath. He utters something hateful to himself as he begins running, building momentum before launching himself at the nun, catching her with a massive superman punch to the back of the head, knocking her tumbling brutally to the pavement.
He proceeded with a swift kicking to the nun's ribs and spine before grabbing the nun by the scruff of her habit and lifting her limp to her feet till face to face. Looking the nun dead in her eyes with menace, the drunk victoriously growled, "You're not so bloody tough tonight, are ya, Batman?"
My friend, Jackson Huge-T, got raped by Huge-D's.
A guy cut me in the lunch line. After that, a rock was thrown at him by my friend.
What do you call the only Trump Supporter to follow his orders to obstruct justice?
Answer: Attorney General William Barr!
Hey, do you know why America sucks? We have the death penalty.
Did you hear about the new restaurant called Karma?
There's no menu. You get what you deserve!
If you push someone that's bullying, if you kill someone that's murder, if there is no evidence it's nothing.
Age is just a number.
Police are just people.
Jail is just a room.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Cuz 7 8 9, right?
No. It's because 7 was a repeated 6 offender.
What do you call a snobbish criminal going down the stairs?
A condescending con descending.
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They'll just arrest the bulb for being broke and beat the room for being dark.
Why did the person go to jail?
He committed a crime.
Riddle: A man killed his wife in his car with a knife, and no one could see him. He threw the body out of the car and threw the knife off a cliff. When he got home, the cops called the man and told him his wife was dead and to come to the scene of the crime. The man agreed and rushed to the scene. When he got there, the cops immediately arrested him. Why?
ANSWER: The cops never said where the scene of the crime is.
One day, a snail got robbed by two turtles.
The cops arrived and arrested the woman for killing her cheating husband, and the son was sent to child services. (Moral - no one cares about the frkn snail and turtles!)
What's the difference between Batman and Robin?
Batman can go to the store without robbin'.
A man was walking down the street with a swivel chair under one arm, a computer under the other, and a desk strapped to his back.
A policeman ran over to him and handcuffed him, saying, "I'm arresting you for impersonating an office, sir!"
You might be innocent, but if you carry a large sum of cash in public, the cops won’t believe that.