Joke

Joke jokes

Blonde

Two blondes fell down a hole.

One said, "It's dark in here, isn't it?"

The other replied, "I don't know; I can't see."

Toe

My grandpa lost his toe today. 😔

Nvm, we found it. It's in his TOEtruck.

Kid

Teacher: What do you want to be when you grow up?

That depressed kid in class: Dead.

Gum

Why did the gum cross the road?

It was stuck to the chicken’s foot.

Car

So, my kid took my car. He crashed it off a bridge. I miss it, but it's going to have my car.

Orphan

"Never going to give you up." That's not what the orphan's parents said.

Orphan

What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?

One gets picked.

Orphan

Why can't orphans have a large bag of crisps?

Because it's family size! 😂

Whey

What is the best whey to make friends with an American boy, you bunch?

Police Officer

Please don't get mad, it's a joke.

What's the difference between a bullet and a police officer? At least when a bullet kills someone, it's fired.

Grandpa

My grandpa's last words before he died in Vietnam were, "What the fuck did I step on?"

Duck

Why was the duck fired from the train station?

He was a bad conducktor!

Cheese

What did one mouse say to the other mouse when it tried to steal the cheese?

"That's nacho cheese!"