Joke

Joke jokes

Credit

Why did the black lady give the IRS a mason jar full of watermelon seeds?

Tax credit.

Plane

If you call the number 800-273-8500 in Afghanistan, they say, "Can you fly a plane?"

Man

You just shot an unarmed man.

Well, he should have armed himself then.

Emo

What's the difference between emo people and normal people? Normal people have wrists.

Grandfather

Why do emo kids sneak up on their Vietnamese grandfathers? Because they hope the war experience kicks in.

Cheetah

I bet when 2 cheetahs race and one of them cheats, the other one says, "You're such a cheetah!" Then they laugh and go and eat a zebra or whatever.

Height

You're so tall you can go see God, but you're so tall your balls got small.

Cricket

If I'm holding a cricket ball in each hand, what do I have?

A really fucking huge cricket.

Orphan

If you are ever mad, punch an orphan.

What are they going to do? Tell their parents?

Number

If 6 was afraid of 7 because 7-8-9, then why was 10 afraid?

'Cause it was right in the middle of 9/11.

Orphan

Why was the orphan so successful?

When they told him, "Go big or go home," he/she only had one option.

Pirate

Why don't pirates take a shower before walking the plank?

They just wash up on shore.