Joke jokes
What did a car say hi to?
It said hi to the school.
Whoever invented the knock-knock joke should get a "no bell" prize.
Why do golfers bring an extra pair of socks? In case they get a hole in one.
Did you hear about the man who swallowed his watch?
He went to the doctor hoping he could give him something to help pass the time.
What do you call a sad Doge?
What?
Nothing but Sarrrooooddd!
It's really great that you can make fun of orphans, 'cause what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
What do you call a cow in a moving van?
A: A mooving cow.
A girl named Ranch went to the store and stayed there. Why? Because she was ranched!
I'm doing something Stephen Hawking can't do... pressing "I'm not a robot."
Why did the man sit on his porch and bark at the postman when he came?
Because his dog had a sore throat!
What is 14 inches long and starts with D?
A Dookie From GREEN DAY
What did the math acorn say when it grew up?
"Gee-I'm-a-tree."
What do you call a wingless fly?
A walk!
What do you call a mom that is yours?
Your mom!
How does Moses make his tea?
He Brews!!!
I got pranked so many times. Once I saw two wheels rolling down the street. I heard this noise. I looked behind me. There's a legless man in a wheelless chair screaming, "HELP! I CAN'T GO ANYWHERE!" but I walked away. I knew it was a prank.
"You're really hot, I wanna hit on you like the plane hit the Twin Towers."
My mom calls me.
Me: WHAT MOM?
No answer.
Me: WHAT?
I don't have a joke, it's just funny reading them.
Roses are red, violets are bl-- oh yeah, I'm bad at jokes.