Joke jokes
Three gay men enter a bar in Iran. They don't come out.
Someone locked me out of my house today... At least the children in my basement aren't my problem anymore.
Aloneness is not the joke, it's unfortunately my reality.
Me: *looks at person's hand* This guy doesn't have fingers!
Random person with no fingers: Why do you have to point that out?
Hey guys! Ello here with an update!
I know I haven't been doing a lot of jokes lately, so I will make sure to do that, but I have something to say! I am going to Disneyland today!! So here is the plan. Today we are going to leave around 2 and go to Downtown Disney for dinner and check into our hotel and stuff like that. Then we are going to wake up bright and early tomorrow and go to Disneyland and stay 'til midnight, and then on Monday we are going to California Adventure! I am missing school on Monday! I'm so excited! And don't worry, I will make sure to tell you guys all about it when we get back. Love y'all!
A man is telling his story to someone. "My friends always said that they would kill me if I wore Gucci or Supreme. On April 1st, I wore both and conversed with them."
"Interesting."
"That's the story of how I got to the morgue," he says to The Gatekeeper of Heaven.
What did one emo kid say to the other?
"I like ya cut, G."
What does it mean when a man sits on a boulder instead of on the ground? A bolder choice.
"Me tells dad joke often."
"I want to hear it."
"Me? You wouldn't get it."
What did the pickle do on the road?
It said, "I'm Pickle Rick!"
Why did the Dinosaur cross the road?
'Cause the Chicken wasn't born yet.
Crazy? I was crazy once, they put me in a room with rubber rats. Rats make me crazy. Crazy? I was crazy once...
Like if you laugh.
Hear about the new restaurant called Karma?
There’s no menu: You get what you deserve.
I remember the time Gordon Ramsay did an African food episode... too bad it was so short he couldn’t find any.
A man went to the doctor, and the doctor said, "What happened to you?"
The man replied and said, "I broke my arm in two places!"
Then the doctor replied with, "DON’T GO BACK TO THOSE TWO PLACES!!"
My friend fell on the Nile river and Egypt last week.
He swears by it, but he’s in denial.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get hit by a bus.
Old people all ways get in the way some times don't they all ways to sloow when they are in front of you and make silly exsgouses dont they it is some times beyond a joke ! Lol
Why do eight-year-old girls wear panties with flowers on?
In loving memory of all the faces that were buried in there.
Why is an orphan crying about its family?
Because it can't "let it go."