Joke jokes
Yep, if someone says to you, "I can't roast trash," say, "Well, some trash is used for recycling, and that is why you have a baby brother!"
You're so short, Aiden looked tall.
My friend was in Afghanistan when he saw someone got shot, and then they bombed him. Now he called them the "Talkwakers."
Some kid online: I f*cked your mom.
Me, an orphan: Jokes on you, I don’t have one!
Dad: Johnny, Johnny?
Johnny: Yes, Papa.
Dad: Getting women?
Johnny: Yes, Papa.
Dad: Telling lies?
Johnny: No, Papa.
Dad: Well, you're 100% lying because you get NO WOMEN!
What do you call a dad without a dad joke?
Dead.
Why does the Queen play poker on the toilet?
Because she always gets a Royal flush!
Why do orphans only have 363 days in a year?
Friend: Why?
Me: Because they don't have a mother or father's day.
What should I sell my dragon for?
Dragon these balls across yo face!
According to a recent poll, your mother said, "I like the guy who saw the guy who doesn't have a brain!"
What do you say to an emo's wrist?...
"I like ur cut G."
A blonde drops off her dress to the dry cleaners.
“Come again!” says the woman behind the desk.
“No, it’s curry this time.”
Me: What's the fifth month of the year?
Friend: May.
Me: May deez nuts fit in your mouth?
Me: How do cowboys say hello?
Friend: Howdy.
Me: How do deez nuts fit in your mouth?
What do you call it if you find an old organ keyboard on the side of the road?
Organ harvesting.
I don't like telling nine eleven jokes, because they always crash and burn.
I thought the Sahara was the largest desert until I saw your forehead.
Ok ok ok so 7 ate 9, but why was 10 scared? Because it was in the middle of 9/11.
It puts a whole new spin on meals on wheels. No pun intended.
Knock knock.
You: Who's there?
Urmom.