Joke jokes
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Ididap!
Ididapoo!!
Why did the cow cross the road? To go to the moooooovies! Nyahahahahahahahahaha!
If wishes were horses, Beggars would ride.
If turnips were watches, I would wear one by my side.
And if if's and an's were pots and pans, The tinker would never work!
A wife and husband go to a barn. The husband picks up a goat and says, “Look at this pig I have to sleep with every night.”
The wife says, “Honey, that’s a goat.”
The husband replies with, “I was talking to the goat.”
What does a nosey pepper do?
It gets jalapeño business!
Dad joke.
Why does a dad get more than a pair of socks at the golf course?
Because of a hole in one!
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To find their way to the store to see their dad.
Want to see a funny joke? Look in the mirror.
What's sticky and brown? A stick!
What does an orphan call a family photo?
A selfie.
What’s black and long?
The Chick-fil-A line.
I'd make a joke about epilepsy, but the computer started flashing.
My jokes are pretty "bone-arifick," if I say so myself. Hehhehe... Get it?
I see 6 letters in "the past."
I have 2020 vision.
I see 7 letters in "the future," I have 2021 vision.
What does the chicken say when he didn't understand something?
"What hap-HENd?"
What do you say to your pony when it's being wild?
Stop horsing around!
Do you want to hear a building joke?
I am still working on it.
I have the best joke:
"You."
I got kicked out of the hospital because I told all the Covid-19 patients to stay positive.
Why can’t you trust an emo kid?
'Cause they always leave you hanging.