Joke jokes
Have you heard of the current event in Africa?
It’s known as the Hunger Games.
Yo mama so big, her belt size said "equator."
What do you call a transgender person in a wheelchair?
An Autobot.
That shirt's very becoming on you.
If I were on you, I’d be coming too.
It’s amazing just how paranoid Hitler was.
In Hitler’s Germany, it was illegal to make jokes about him or his regime.
Come on! Forbidding Germans from making jokes? Isn’t that a bit like forbidding Americans from eating salad?
Why were the Twin Towers mad?
Because they ordered pepperoni and got plane. (Yes, it's "plain," shut.)
What do you call a guy in a wheelchair that lives with the royal family?
Rolls Royce.
What is the difference between a woman and ice? The ice always comes back.
What’s an Emo’s favorite exercise?
The dead hang.
Son: Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
Dad: Don't know, why?
Son: Because they taste funny.
Two men walk into a bar, no clue how they didn't see it.
Teacher: I was an orphan as a kid.
Students: Damn!
Teacher: Is anyone missing?
Students: Your parents!
A man went to the doctor, and the doctor said, "What happened to you?"
The man replied and said, "I broke my arm in two places!"
Then the doctor replied with, "DON’T GO BACK TO THOSE TWO PLACES!!"
What is Michael Jordan's favorite coffee place? Dunkin' Donuts.
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
He didn't have the guts.
What did Santa say when he got to the club? Ho, ho, ho!
Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere.
Why did the man put himself on fire?
To BURN Calories.
Those were a-mug-zing jokes. They were Mugderful, and Mugjestic.
I told a seal a joke, it went like this: "Why did the kid cross the playground?" He said, "Why?" I said, "To get to the other slide." And then he said, "That's the sealiest thing I've ever heard!"