Joke jokes
Lynx, where the fuck are you? This is Dagger Jr. (Proof in comments).
After death, what is the only organ in the female body which remains warm?
My penis.
I'd make an emo joke, but that would be cutting a little too close.
What do you call a room full of disabled people with epilepsy?
A seizure salad.
What do you call a flat-chested emo?
A cutting board.
How do you lift a depressed person up?
No need, they'll find a way to get on the tree somehow.
What do you call a guy that's high in a wheelchair?
A baked potato.
What do you call a Chinese baby?
Sum Ting Wong.
Guy: Michael Jackson wasn’t in ancient times!
Me: hee hee egypt.
Today at the bank, an old lady asked me to help her check her balance.
So I pushed her over.
For dinner, this girl had noodles. The next day, she could not find her skinny sister. The mom said, "Your sister is dead!" sadly. The girl asked, "She was skinny, right?" The mom said yes. The sister laughed, "I ate her! That’s why the noodles were very skinny!"
What's the difference between a peanut and a priest?
With a peanut, you have to break the shell open for the nut to come out.
WAIT! I remember how the joke goes! These two cannibals are hanging out eating lunch, which is a clown, you see, 'cause they're cannibals and one cannibal says to the other cannibal, "Does this taste funny to you?"
What do you call a rare fart in Egypt? A toot uncommon!
What’s a squirrel’s favorite OTT? Nut-Flix.
Knock, knock.
Orphan: Who's there?
Not your parents!
Why were 9/11 victims so mad?
They ordered three pepperoni pizzas, not two planes!
Who needs April Fool's when your life is a joke?
What mental disorder do all Mexicans have?
Borderline Personality Disorder.
What did the mother say to Michael J. on the beach?
"Excuse me sir, but you're in my son!"