What do you call a nine year old with no friends?
A Sandy Hook survivor.
Joke Jokes
What do you call a male cow who’s taking a nap?
A bull dozer.
The reason Stephen sounds like a computer is because he ate his USB.
Why did the baby cross the road?
Because it was stapled to the chicken.
What happened to the man who made too many bad jokes? He served out a cruel and unusual PUNishment.
Did you hear about the person who got hit in the head with a soda can?
Good thing it was a "soft" drink!
Whenever you wanna roast an orphan, say "yo mamma".
I don't get why people don't like my abortion jokes. Do they have a stick up their ass? Wait, that's the other hole.
What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon?
One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer, the other is just a watermelon.
I screamed "Jenga" today when watching the 9/11 documentary.
What do you call a Chinese baby?
Sum Ting Wong.
What do you call a blank piece of paper?
Women's rights.
What do you call a rare fart in Egypt? A toot uncommon!
What’s a squirrel’s favorite OTT? Nut-Flix.
Knock, knock.
Orphan: Who's there?
Not your parents!
What's the difference between a peanut and a priest?
With a peanut, you have to break the shell open for the nut to come out.
WAIT! I remember how the joke goes! These two cannibals are hanging out eating lunch, which is a clown, you see, 'cause they're cannibals and one cannibal says to the other cannibal, "Does this taste funny to you?"
What mental disorder do all Mexicans have?
Borderline Personality Disorder.
Who needs April Fool's when your life is a joke?
Why were 9/11 victims so mad?
They ordered three pepperoni pizzas, not two planes!
