Joke jokes
I pushed an orphan in a wheelchair into a fire and yelled, "Hot wheels!"
What’s the best thing about 26 year olds?
There are 20 of them.
What does a cannibal call a pregnant woman? A combo meal.
Here is a good joke: asking for consent before sex.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the fool's house.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
Q: What season can an orphan see their family tree?
A: Fall.
If you don't get it, in the fall trees have no leaves, there [are] just empty branches, like an orphan's tree.
What do you call sad coffee... deppresso!
Bill Gates teaches a kindergarten class to count to ten. “Dos, 1, 2, 3, 3.1, 95, 98, ME, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 8.1, 10.”
What do you call a nine year old with no friends?
A Sandy Hook survivor.
What do you call a male cow who’s taking a nap?
A bull dozer.
The reason Stephen sounds like a computer is because he ate his USB.
Why did the baby cross the road?
Because it was stapled to the chicken.
What happened to the man who made too many bad jokes? He served out a cruel and unusual PUNishment.
Did you hear about the person who got hit in the head with a soda can?
Good thing it was a "soft" drink!
Whenever you wanna roast an orphan, say "yo mamma".
I don't get why people don't like my abortion jokes. Do they have a stick up their ass? Wait, that's the other hole.
What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon?
One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer, the other is just a watermelon.
I screamed "Jenga" today when watching the 9/11 documentary.
What do you call a Chinese baby?
Sum Ting Wong.
What do you call a blank piece of paper?
Women's rights.