Joke jokes

I am dark humor.

What did the cucumber say to the bell pepper that wasn't wearing enough clothes?

You need more dressing.

How do you fix a cracked pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch!

I told my deaf mom to be nice to the neighbors. She didn't listen...

What is another name for a stupid fish?

"Dum bass."

How many times can you subtract 10 from 100?

Once. The next time you would be subtracting 10 from 90.

I wasn’t planning on going for a run today, but those cops came out of nowhere.

I got the joke from my brother.

What did momma seal name her twin girls?

Luceal and Sealia.

Denki: Hey Mineta, I have a joke.

Mineta: ...go on...

Denki: Ochako's booty.

Mineta: I don't get it?

Denki: Exactly.

Mineta: *cries T_T*

Hey! My name is Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight?

I'm not completely useless; I can be used as a bad example.

Who is chicken's favorite actor?

James Cor-hen!

What do you call a dumb and mean crocodile?

A crookodile.

Why did the orphan cross the road? They thought they saw their mother.

This is the true worst joke ever:

What did the person say to the other guy when he met him?

Hi!

What did the sign on an out-of-business brothel say?

"Beat it. We're closed."

Did you hear the one about the hills?

It was hillarious.

Why couldn't the man get out of the maize maze?

He got corn-ered!

I'd tell you a joke about pizza, but it's too cheesy.

What's the difference between a baby and an onion?

I cry when I chop up an onion.