Joke jokes
Your legs are just like Oreos! I wanna split the ends and eat what's in between.
What do you call a sleeping dinosaur? A dinosnore!
Two blondes walk into a bar. I thought one of them would have seen it.
Imagine the Russians showing up late to the 1917 revolution with a Tsarbucks in hand. They were late, so I guess they weren't Russian. They were probably Stalin.
What do you call a sad strawberry?
A blueberry.
Guess how I got away from my mom saying I can't play Fortnite? I took my stuff and I ran to Iran.
I like my coffee the way I like jokes about my coffee, I don't.
Tj's hairline is so far back, Blue's Clues can't find it.
Him: What's the difference between Incestry.com and Ancestry.com?
Her: What?
Him: Nothing, either way you will be dating your cousin.
An American is touring the Soviet Union. A Russian takes him to a school so he can see what it's like. He asks the kids if they like the Soviet Union. All of the kids say yes, they love it. All but one. That kid bursts out crying. The American asks what's wrong, and he cries, "I want to live in the Soviet Union!"
My young son saw Trump on TV. He asked, "Why is the man on TV painted orange?" I replied, "Son, when Russia pays that much for equipment, they don't want it to rust."
A blonde walks in and says, "I want to buy that TV."
The seller says, "I don't sell to blondes."
The blonde comes back the next day with brown hair and says, "I want to buy that TV."
The seller says, "I don't sell to blondes."
The blonde comes back the next day with brown hair and says, "I want to buy that TV."
The seller says, "I don't sell to blondes."
The blonde asks, "That's it, how'd you know I was a blonde?"
The seller replies, "Because that's a microwave."
A kid has an older brother that’s a very popular lifeguard. He sees all of the people that talk to his brother, but he’s fairly ignored. So one day he asks his brother why everyone likes him so much. His older brother says, “Well, all you gotta do is stick a potato in your pocket.” So the next day the boy goes back to the pool and he has a potato in his pocket, but everyone is avoiding him even more now. At the end of the day he goes up to his brother and asks why it didn’t work, and his brother says, “Dumbass, you were supposed to put it in the front!”
An emo girl and a squirrel both fall out of a tree. Who hits the ground first? The squirrel. The rope stops the emo girl.
What do you call a feminist? A Karen.
Why did the sperm cross the road? ———— because I put on the wrong sock today.
The only difference between my grandma and the Twin Towers is that they collapsed faster than my grandma.
When is a rapist safe around children?
When his plans are oven ready.
All of the people disliking this category are probably emo.
What part do people slit the most?
Everyone.