Joke jokes
What did the mustard say to the ketchup? "Quit running so fast, let me ketchup to you."
Why couldn’t the midget ride the bus?
He can’t slam dunk his bus fare!
What is the difference between a human and a burger?
When you're going to Titanic: It's the best ship in the world.
When you know it's sinking: It's the poor ship!
What is yellow and can’t fly?
A school bus.
What goes moo? Cow.
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What's black and white and red all over????? A zebra in a blender!
Cool kid: I slept with your sister.
Me: Never knew my brother was a girl.
Everyone else: :O
What do kids with cancer and cancer jokes have in common?
CANCER!
Just kidding, they are both fun to laugh at.
The duck walked up to the lemonade stand.
And he said to the man Running the stand, "Hey! Bomp bomp bomp Got any grapes?"
How do you call somebody who has bought a Corona?
A Cor-owner.
The other day I lost all my crayons.
I just wish I had a shoulder to cray on.
The duck bought lipstick. When he paid, he said, "Put it on my bill."
I went to the bathroom and into a stall to see a hole in the wall. It reminded me of "The Lickable Wallpaper" from "Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory." I jokingly started licking. Though, the carrot tasted musky and kinda wrinkly.
A skeleton walks into a bar and said it takes "backbone" to mess with me, and if you try to insult me, I have thick skin.
What's black, white, and red all over?
Lossvagus school shooting.
What has tree roots and what do I have for kids? What is the difference between a human and a used tire?
Tree roots are under the tree, and used tires are under the Hummer.
What do you call a school bus driver that cannot walk? A silly school bus driver!
Why was the baseball player stuck in the stadium?
'Cause he made his home run.
Why does Helen Keller look in the toilet after taking a poop?
Nobody knows!