Joke jokes
What's 10 inches and makes women scream?
Cot death!
What did Sally say when she was stuck in the water with kelp?
"I need kelp! KELPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP"
What's the difference between a skeleton and a baby? I don't set the skeleton on fire.
What do you call a skeleton with no arms? An un-armed skeleton.
There was a math teacher on a plane that crashed. What was the last thing that went through their head?
A pentagon!
(9/11 joke)
What hood do zombies come from?
Dead Ends.
I'm ticked off by this tick joke!
Space therapist in between the e and the r.
The rapists!
What is 6" long, bright red, and your wife cries when you feed it to her?
Her miscarriage.
What's worse than 10 babies in a truck?
One baby in 10 trucks.
What is it called when Bill Cosby and an illegal immigrant fight?
Aliens vs. Predator
What was Stephen Hawking's shampoo?
Head and Shoulders.
Three gay guys walk into a bar.
There is only one stool left, what do they do?
They flip the stool over.
What do you call a skeleton with no bones? A boneless boy.
What's the difference between me and a bus?
I'm not on fire...
Deez nuts!
GOT EEMMMMMMMM!
A teacher gives her kindergarten students four flavors of lifesavers, and they have to guess the flavors. The students guess cherry, lime, and orange. They don't know the last flavor. So, the teacher gives them a hint and says, "It's what your parents call each other." [honey] But a little girl shouts and says, "OMG, they're assholes."
I read a story about a rabbit being raised. It was a hare-raising tale!
A pedophile brings his eight-year-old daughter to the doctor's office. The doctor asked her if she would like some candy? Her father replies, "Please, no more candy for her. I gave her enough today."
Why did the pedophile cross the road?
Because there was a school on the other side.