Joke jokes
What do you call 6 gay men having a fight?
Rainbow Six Siege
If you have a girlfriend/crush that's shorter than you, go up to her and say, "You're short, lemme add some inches."
What's black and yellow and can't swim?
A school bus full of orphans.
I thought the Sahara was the largest desert until I saw your forehead.
I entered ten puns in a joke contest to see which one would win.
No pun in ten did.
Yo hairline so long that it doesn't have a stopping point.
Mom, shut up. Me? I don't shut up, I grow up. When I look at you, I throw up.
Why don't pirates take a shower before walking the plank?
They just wash up on shore.
What's long and black? The line at KFC.
How do you find out the price of an emo? You scan his barcode.
What does an orphan call a family picture?
A selfie.
What did Tennessee?
Same thing that Arkansas did.
It was Christmas time for Little Johnny. He was going to make some cookies and milk for Santa until he heard shaking and moaning from his mother's bedroom.
He thinks, "Meh, Dad's probably back from the grocery store."
But 2 seconds later, he heard a "Ho Ho Ho Oh YEAH!" and then a slap. He opens the door. He finds Santa riding on his 19-year-old mom. He asks, "Santa, when did you get here and WHAT are you doing?"
Santa replied, "Your mother asked for her 'milk jar' to be filled, and that's what I am doing."
Johnny says, "Oh. But, Mom, you told me Dad was here, well where is he?"
(Santa winks at you)
Random guy: Hi, how old are you?
Me: 15
The guy: You're so young, age is just a number.
Me: Do you know what else is a number?
The guy: What?
Me: 911
Got the George Floyd pack, this shit makin' it hard to breathe.
I would roast you but you're already so hot.
I would tell a 9/11 joke, but it would just crash and burn.
Cheese, gimme cheese!
(inspired by a friend)
I took the trash to the recycling bin, and two days later, my mom asked me, "Where's your sister?" I said, "In the recycling line to be turned into a bottle."
The emo kid went for a high five. People say he's still hanging.