Joke jokes
Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? At least it was a soft drink.
Why did my boyfriend leave me?
Because he's gay.
But why did he come back to me?
Because I'm actually a guy :-)
What do you call a man with no legs?
Neil (kneel)
What do you call a squirrel with wings? A flying squirrel, it's pretty self-explanatory.
I know you don’t like rape jokes, but I’m gonna force one on you anyway.
What do you do when your dishwasher stops working?
Hit your wife harder.
My friend: "Ya mama so stupid, she sits on the TV and watches the couch!"
Me: "That joke's older than your mom!"
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Doctor.
Doctor who?
So many of these jokes are unoriginal, and you guys need to step up your game.
Timmy goes to the doctor and says, "There's a crack in my butt, doctor." Timmy, there is a crack in everyone's butt, see?
What's the hardest part of eating vegetables?
The wheelchair.
What's the difference between a baby and a tire swing?
A tire swing doesn't die when you hang it from a tree.
My cock was in the book of world records...
The librarian told me to take it out.
Before the chicken or the egg, there was only Chuck Norris.
A doctor fell into a well and broke his collarbone.
The doctor should attend the sick and leave the well alone!
Why did the octopus cross the road?
Who knows and who cares?
Why did Iran, ran?
Iran said, "I ran away!"
How do you fit three gay guys on a bar stool?
Flip it upside down.
Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs.
What is a lot?
Syphilis.