Joke jokes
What do you call Stephen Hawking's wife? Siri.
They say masturbation is better with a dead arm. Apparently, I ruined that funeral.
What do you call a person with only one arm?
Half-assed.
What is the difference between a bag of dead babies and a Lamborghini?
I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage. :)
Why was Helen Keller's belly button bruised?
Her boyfriend was blind too.
What is the difference between Dray Dray and an overrated footballer called Pogba?
Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone chucked a brick at her.
Why did Sally throw a clock out the window? She had brain damage from the brick.
What did the Nazi order from Wendy's?
Two number NEINs.
So I was doing a puzzle, and I was getting triggered with it. My friend said, "It's puzzling why you're so triggered."
What happens when you say, "Hey Siri?"
Stephen Hawking answers.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer!
What did the Hiroshima survivor say about the day Little Boy dropped? "It was a blast!"
What kind of car does Yoda drive? A Toyoda.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it looked in the mirror.
What’s big, red, and eats rocks?
A big, red, rock eater.
Why is sex like math? You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there's no multiplying.
What do you call a cow jumping over barbed wire? Utter destruction.
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
'Cause 7 was a 6 offender.
Why is 5 afraid of 7? Because 6, 7, 8.
What's the difference between a red Ferrari and a pile of dead babies?
I don't have a red Ferrari in my car.